He's nothing but everything

Chapter 10 It Will Get Better

My life was in a downwards spiral and I had absolutely no control over anything. I had lost my best friend and I had lost my virginity, there wasn't anything else that I could have lost, but I think I spoke to soon when I said that because after getting my results back I found out that I was barely passing school, this was so unlike me, I mean I was Deputy head prefect in my primary school and up till this day I've always gotten A's and B's and now I was barely making it. It seemed like everything that could go wrong was all happening to me at once. I knew that I needed to take back my life but I wasn't sure how to start. The first thing on my list was to speak to Aaron about the whole sex situation, I wanted to get the awkwardness out of the way, the next thing on my list was to speak to my so called friends, because I couldn't be alone forever, I couldn't be living this bottomless pit of a life, and I knew I wasn't going to let Liam get in the way of my happiness anymore. All of these things were honestly easier said than done, but I knew I had to just get it over with.

In all of this madness I realized who my true friends were, it was actually none of my existing friends, they were all snakes that waited for every opportunity to bite and lash out with their venomous words, they were fickle and could care less about the things that mattered most in life, when I started joining them during break times again it was as if they didn't even notice that I hadn't been around for a while, it was like I never left, they were hardly my friends and deep down I always knew that, which is why that didn't hurt me not one bit.

A true friend is not someone that you go looking for, a true friend is someone who is there for you when you least expect anyone to be, he or she just unexpectedly comes into your life and decides to stay. That's exactly what happened to me. Melanie was in all of my classes as we took the same course at school, she was one of the two girls in my engineering and graphics design class and we started to become the best of friends. She just came up to me one day while I was sitting alone, isolating myself from everyone that I once knew and she started talking to me, making light and polite conversation about school, and then we started to talk about life and very soon I couldn't go a day without seeing her, she became my best friend, she showed me what it was like to be cared for, she asked about my day and she asked if I had ate, she pushed me to focus on school again, everything was always so positive with her, she was like a force on her own, she had this bright Aura , it was like there was nothing negative that could get past that Aura and that's what I loved about her the most. We were friends before but we hardly ever hung out together like the way we started hanging out recently and that's because of the crowd that I usually hung out with, everyone knew that their characters were questionable and that's why they always stuck together, now they had let a new monster in their group and her name was Viola, oh how I started to dislike her now. There was a sudden rumour going around about Renè, Reese and Ally, and I knew that this rumor was in fact true, it was a few months ago, when Renè and I still had a good relationship that she had told me what those three had done, it's quite shocking but I guess it's normal for them. Renè had explained how they decided to bunk the school day and go binge drinking, she said they were feeling explorative and decided to explore each other's bodies, they had oral sex with each other, like a threesome, kissing, sucking and licking each other, touching each other in their most sensitive parts all because they were horny at the time. I didn't even have a response to what she told me, I was both shocked and embarrassed, I didn't know how to respond in a nonjudgmental manner. Every conversation that played in my head lead to me loosing the only friends I had at the time so I just stopped talking, I think that was the exact moment that Renè and I stopped being so close, that's when our relationship just died, it's a different case if they were lesbian, I would have been happy for them all, because I'm not against same sex partners, it's just that they weren't lesbian or bisexual, they all had boyfriends, so why would they go and do this suddenly, it's like they decided to all cheat on their partners together, and how weird was it to explore your body with someone you considered your friend, my mind again just couldn't stop thinking, so I just let that one go without another word.