He's nothing but everything

Chapter 21 Round In Circles

Yet again I find myself in an intense state of depression and anxiety, and it's all because of one person, one guy to be exact, Liam. He always does this to me, he gives me hope for something better to come and then he lets me down in so many ways. I just started to trust him again, and I just started to open up to him and I told him the truth about my feelings, he told me he had feelings for me to. Recently he had been flirting with me, I know he has, wanting me to write my name on the back of his school shirt, stroking my foot with his underneath the desk and all the other flirtatious comments he makes when we chat on the phone. It has been a month now that he had confessed his feelings for me, and in this month I had entirely ignored Aaron, I gave him no time of mines, I hardly chatted to him on the phone and I had always avoided walking him with him home, I did everything in my power to stay away from Aaron, I didn't want to use him and cheat on him because I knew my real feelings now, and I no longer wanted to drag Aaron along, it was clear he had other options so why would we need to drag this out longer then it had to be, I was going to break up with Aaron, I was going to tell him the truth because I believe in nothing but honesty, honesty is the best policy in my books, and he deserves the truth, I wasn't going to give him details, I was just going to tell him that I no longer have feelings for him and that we should move on, but here I am avoiding Aaron because I know who I really care about and who I really want to be with and then there's Liam, he confessed to me, but he's still being intimate with Viola, and I know this for a fact because I saw the picture of her dirty panties spilled with a white fluid which only means she was turned on, what could Liam have been doing with her to make her so turned on by him, I know he's handsome, but it takes more then a handsome face and a good body to make panties that wet. I feel bad for invading his privacy and I know that I obviously can't ask him about it because he will know that I read his messages and that was wrong of me. My point being, how can he say he liked me and do and say all those heart melting things but still not feel anything, was Viola that good of a lover that he just can't leave her, well I didn't want him to hurt her, I just wanted him to tell her the truth like I was going to tell Aaron, but instead he's doing the opposite, the best thing for me to do right now is to let Liam go, because this is toxic behaviour, I tried so many times to give him a chance but he's just not doing what I want him to do, and it's just hurting me more and more, and what's worse, as times goes by and he does all these things to me I start to like him more and then I hate him again. This is becoming monotonous. 

There was a month left for school, after this month I was going to be free from Liam, and the thought of him, I knew I wasn't going to see him again, and he wasn't going to make the effort to see me either so it was best to now ignore him, because that is what he deserves. He can't have it both ways, he can't have us both, when he chose to tell me that he liked me he chose right then and there to end the friendship that we had and he started something else, it's all his fault now that we lost everything between us, there was nothing left. I'm choosing to run away, after the month is done I don't want anything to do with him.