ethereal - draco malfoy

illness

t/w: ??? mental illness.
I suffer from these myself, so please keep the hate comments to yourself:)

I've never been sick a day in my life. My immune system has always been incredibly strong. So imagine how fucking pissed I am when my mum comes in my room, wakes me up from a nap and says "We need to talk."

I groan and sit up, hugging one of my pillows. "Hm?" I hum, my eyes still closed. She walks in and takes a seat on the edge of my bed. "We have a mediwitch here to see you." she blurts. That wakes me up instantly. "Why?"

She swallows and sighs. "I was speaking with Cissy about your behavior over the past few years. How you've always gone from angry to completely calm to no emotion at all. We also talked about your behavior since your father passed. How you either sleep for days or don't sleep at all. How you're always tired and never hungry, with absolutely no motivation. She told me that you should be seen by a mediwitch to see if you have any mental illnesses." she explains.

"And how do we see that?" I question, growing more aggravated. Of course I don't have a bloody mental illness. I'm just tired.

"She's going to give you a page of questions and you check off the boxes that apply." she says. I nodded and sigh. "Alright, hurry up." I say with a yawn.

My mother leaves and a few seconds later, a mediwitch comes in. She isn't wearing a nurses dress, instead she's wearing normal clothes.

"Hi! I'm Lydia. I just need you to fill out this sheet and then give me a minute to examine it then we'll be done." she says. I nod and take the paper before trudging to my desk and plopping down.

I take out a quill and dip it in ink.

How often would you say you sleep?
A lot.
On a scale of 1-10, how tired are you usually? 12.
Have you ever had suicidal or self-harming thoughts? Yes.
Do you feel guilt if/when harming others? No.
How often do you find yourself angry?
Often.
How easy is it to control your anger?
Incredibly difficult.
What emotion do you feel the most?
No emotion. I'm always emotionless.

I answer about sixty questions before walking back to my bed and handing the mediwitch my sheet. She scans over it for about thirty minutes and I lay back down when she goes to get my mother.

They both come back in and my mother sits down next to me. I have my arm over my eyes, wanting to go back to sleep.

"I believe Cynthia has Bipolar Disorder, also known as Manic Depression. This is why she's fine for a while, but then suddenly goes back to sleeping for a long period of time. She also has Disruptive Mood Dysregulation Disorder. This causes extreme anger and irritability, and frequent temper outbursts. These are both often found in Muggles, but thankfully we have potions to help." The mediwitch explains.

I take my arm off of my eyes and look over at my mother. "What will the potions do?" she questions.

"One will help ease her symptoms of her depressed mood, so she'll have more motivation and she won't be tired all of the time. The other will act as a mood stabilizer. She'll still get angry, but it should help with the outbursts." she elaborates.

My mother nods and asks to have a word with her out in the corridor. As soon as she closes my door, I roll over and go back to sleep.

—

I wake up feeling slightly less tired. I grab my wand and walk downstairs in only my sweater and underwear, not really caring who's here.

My mother and Cissy are in the kitchen when I walk in, and they both send me a smile. I yawn and make my way over to the kitchen island to sit next to them. I grab a green apple and take a seat before biting into it.

My mother hands me a red potion in a small vial. "Take this, it's for your Bipolar Disorder." she says, beckoning towards the vial. I reluctantly take the vial and twist the cork out before swallowing down the potion.

She then hands me a blue potion in the same vial. "This is for your anger."

I groan before taking the vial out of her hands and swallowing down the contents of it.

"I think this is all a load of bullocks. I think I'm just a normal teenage Death Eater witch with a dead father and a dead mate. I think I don't have a mental disorder and I also think that I want to go find that mediwitch and snap her neck." I vented angrily, raising my voice the more I spoke.

"Cynthia, calm down. Just give it two weeks, that's all I'm asking. Take them once a day, every day, for two weeks. If nothing happens then you can stop taking them." my mother bargains.

"Fine." I huffed.

"How long have I been in my room? Sleeping a lot?" I added.

"17 days." my mother said shortly.

I sighed.

"I'm going back to sleep." I said, before getting up and walking back to my room. I locked the door behind me before plopping down on my bed.

I was half tempted to see what Malfoy was doing, but I know I couldn't. No communication, no using our connection, no seeing each other, nothing. Bloody hell. It's not that I enjoy his company or anything, I'm just bored out of my mind.

He's probably in class right now anyways. School started back up a two weeks ago, meaning that I was probably extremely behind on my school work. It'll be fine, I'll bounce back. I always do.

I then realized that I would be getting my first task from The Dark Lord this summer, meaning I would be busy, meaning no seeing Malfoy. We probably wouldn't see each other until our sixth year, unless his mother comes over and he comes with her.

I don't really know why I'm stressing so much about it, honestly. Bloody pathetic, it is. I sighed and turned over before shutting my eyes and doing what I do best; sleeping.