Soulless eyes.

Chapter 9

They think we're drowning but our heads are still above the waves,
Above the waves.

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Angel's P.O.V.

4 years and a half ago...

I slowly opened my tired eyes and saw bright familiar lights in the room I was in, hello again hospital. My head was exploding and I couldn't control my body, my eyes trying their best to close again but I kept them open and looked around the room I was in. It was empty and silent except for the heart monitor making 'beep' sounds every second.

I felt fingers touch my forearm slowly tracing random shapes and making the place burn. I looked in her direction and saw her smirking and looking at my arm like it was the most interesting thing ever created.

'Good morning, Angel.' she whispered in a warm voice and in the same way my mother used to talk to me...It brang tears in my eyes but I was quick to wipe them away.

I remember why I got here. Shit. I attempted suicide and failed, obviously, but I was so mad. So mad at myself I couldn't even do that right, so mad that I didn't make sure that no one could make it to me in time. My door was locked but somehow Scott got in. Scott.

A nurse entered the room and smiled my way when she saw I was awake. I smiled back being polite and asked her how I got here,  confused.

"Well a boy found you and called the hospital and we got there just in time, your body didn't digest the majority of the pills so it was all good. Now, I need to take these pills with water before I leave you alone. Do you want me to allow people to come in here?" people caring about me, yeah sure, I don't believe it.

"Yeah sure, and thanks for the information." I gave her a small smile before swallowing the horrible pills and calming down a bit, but not too much.

She left and then immediately after her exit followed Scott's entrance in the cold room. He came near my bed, not saying a word, just staring into my soul, quietly searching for whatever he wanted.

"Hey Sco-"

"Why did you do it?" he cut me off by asking that.

I just looked at him, not knowing how to answer. Should I tell him? No. Would it help? No. Could he solve anything? No. Does he care? No.

"Wha-"

"You know what I'm talking about, Angel. I'm talking about you taking a whole bottle of pills, you trying to kill yourself, you crying in your room alone, blocking everything else out. When did you get this way?" he asked as calmly as he could, his eyes starting to water.

Why should I tell you? "I'm ok-"

"No, you're not, but you are too good at hiding it" he said tears starting to cover his cheeks "You used to be so happy, so cheery and positive. You used to be the reason everybody still had hope. I miss that old Angel. Where is she? What have you done with her?" he asked with tears in his eyes and pain in his voice.

"Oh, sweet Scott, she never existed." I kindly smiled at him. That's the only thing he will know, the only way I'll try to keep it. I don't need his sympathy, I don't need anyone else except for her.