After the War (Klance)

Chapter Four

Lance P.O.V.

I didn't know how long I'd been out. I only knew that when I awoke, Keith Kogane was looking at me with all the sadness of a thousand wars. It broke my heart.

"Lance.." He spoke my name, and it felt like a dream. It couldn't really be him. He left me, and didn't look back. And yet, the moment I see him again, I'm saving his life. Why?

"Keith, I-"

"No," he cut me off, "let me talk first." He took a deep breath and looked me dead in the eyes. "I shouldn't have left, and I know that now. I thought I was doing the right thing. For you, for the universe. But I was wrong. I never meant to hurt you." Tears were in his eyes, and I didn't know if I could forgive him. He had hurt me. And I was so tired of forgiving. But this was Keith. And he never admitted he was wrong, so I could assume, that out of everyone that had ever apologized to me for anything, if one of them was to mean it. It would be him. But I wasn't going to just forget all that pain.

"Keith, I may be able to forgive you, but I don't think I can ever forget how much it hurt." My lips trembled as I spoke. "Keith I was going to lose you. You were dead. Lying there. There was so much blood. And," I bit my lip and tried to contain the emotions that were coming. "I couldn't let that happen. Even though I was so angry. That you just left all over again. As if I'm nothing. After all those years, fighting side by side. And getting to know you. I thought you cared Keith. I mean. I chose Allura, but. I thought I had to. Because you wouldn't choose me. And. I," It was getting harder to talk. I didn't expect to be spitting out all this emotion in trauma. "I, I thought that, you." I had to recollect myself. "I thought that I would be happy with her. But yet, you were always there proving me wrong. Like you always do. And then she died. And I thought I would at least have you there as a friend." I looked away from him, "but you left, like I was nothing. Just like you did when you gave Shiro the black lion."

I couldn't read his face. We looked at each other for a while then he looked away. I wanted to say fuck it, to just let him back into my life and forgive him completely and confess my feelings for him. But, I had to fight for what I wanted, I had to fight for him to know that he couldn't leave me like that again. 

"If you don't want to let me back into your life, fine. But I have news I came here to tell you." The emotion had left his eyes. It made my heart sink. Maybe there was no him caring about me anymore. First it was the war, and now it was his leadership in the Blades. His duties came before me. And I wasn't looking for that in a relationship.

"What is it this time Keith," I didn't hide my short temper with him. I was hurt, and I was angry. And I was done hiding it from him.

"Voltron isn't the only cross reality vessel anymore. A new ship from another reality passed through three quintants ago. No one knows if they're here for good, or if they're just passing through." My eyes widened as he spoke. Did this mean that Voltron wouldn't be able to defeat this new weapon if it decided to attack? "Before you say anything, I don't expect you to go to war. I know it's not what you want. I came here because I knew you could be trusted to pass the information along to the right people."

I nodded. I knew where the information had to go, I just didn't know why it had to be me. Why not to Shiro, or Pidge. Maybe even Krolia. Why all the way back here to Earth. 

"I came to you because you're the person I trust the most," it was like he had read my mind. "It was news that had to be delivered in person. That way it had no way of being leaked or hacked." So it didn't even matter that he might have missed me. I mean yeah, this was a big deal. But he never even called to say hi, so why?

"Why? You never even call? How am I the person you trust the most??" He looked hurt by my questions.

"Lance are you st-" he took a deep breath. "Lance. Me leaving, that's not what that meant. I-" I could tell he was getting emotional and it was hard not feel guilty about it. "You deserve more than me!" It was getting harder for him to talk. "I'm always so angry! Everything I do hurts you! I left back then for you! So you wouldn't have to worry about losing your lion! I mean- I was needed and I knew that,  but- God lance. I lost so many people. I don't want to let you in and lose you too!" Tears were streaming down his face and he was trying to get up, as soon as he got onto his feet he started to fall.

Both Veronica and I were immediately by his side. He fell into my arms and I looked up at him. "Do you really think so lowly of me that you think I'd try to hurt you...."

"That's not the point Keith," I looked softly into his eyes. "The point is that you left me twice. And it hurt me. You pushed me away Keith. I understand you've lost people, but you never even gave me a chance." He hid his face into my chest and I wrapped my arms around him softly, so as not to hurt him.

"I-I'm sorry..." I knew what he meant, and I held him close. 

"Shhh. Shhh." I stroked his hair softly. He started to cry. Veronica took the hint that I could handle it from here. She left the room, leaving us alone together. "Am I just not good enough for you?"

"No," he looked down at me. "I'm not good enough for you." 

"That's not true Keith, that's just what you're telling yourself." I smiled softly up at him.

"Why," his lip quivered. I was honestly frustrated. How could he not see it, it was so obvious. I was clearly in love with him. And I had been. Since the beginning. I had to come to terms with liking a boy. It took me a long time, but when I did, I opened up to him. He didn't shut me down at first like I expected. Instead, I saw more of who he really was. I decided, it was time to just get it over with.

"Keith I fucking love you."

He looked at me speechless. My heart pounded and my face flushed as tears rushed to my eyes. This was it, I was going to be rejected right here and right now. At least I would finally know. 

He looked deep into my eyes. His dark purple eyes could have melted me. He was handsome, and it made me weak. Then he did something I never expected. Instead of answering he grabbed my face and kissed me. His lips were different than Allura's. Her's had been more plump and soft. His were rough and thinner. But they kissed me with passion, and he moved his lips instead of staying still. They moved in perfect sync with mine, and they fit so perfectly. It felt like his lips were made for mine.

He pulled away slowly and pressed his forehead to mine. "Wow.." That was all I could say as he held onto my face and breathed hot air against me. 

"I know I need to let my walls down Lance, I'm trying. Not enough obviously, but. I love you too." He opened his eyes and looked right into mine. They were the only thing I could see. 

"You can't leave me again," my voice cracked and shook. I know I sounded weak, but I was pleading to him with my eyes. "You can't tell me you love me and leave me. I thought I had lost you. It would be worse to have you alive and ripped away from me than dead." He hid in my shoulder and hugged me.

"I know.. and. I'm going to make it up to you. Somehow." I nodded and hugged him back.

"I'm going to be holding you to that..."