Ishimondo Oneshots

Incomplete (Fluff)

I had a lot of difficulty falling asleep.

Thoughts kept non stop rushing through my head.

Making it so I wasn't able to relax and fall asleep.

I may be used to a lack of sleep, but I usually cause that consciously by staying up and studying into late hours of the night.

However.

That wasn't the case right now.

It wasn't because I was worrying about something.

It wasn't because I couldn't stop my brain from thinking about what I'd studied.

It wasn't because of an event that had happened that day.

It wasn't because of any small inconvenience.

It was because I was hopelessly in love.

I was shocked the second I realised when I fell in love with this person.

I really didn't expect it.

I thought he was just a friend.

That's a funny thought.

He.

I always expected myself to grow up and fall in love with a girl.

I guess it was because that was 'the norm' pushed onto me all my life.

It was all I was ever told: "You're gonna grow up, be successful and then at some point settle down with a nice woman."

At this rate and if I pursue my feelings and they're returned, I'll settle down with a not so nice man. Not that he's not nice, just a bit rough with those he's not close to.

This whole situation was too difficult.

I wanted to stop my feelings but, how could I?

There was no way I could.

But I guess I...

No.

If I was going to come to terms with this.

It meant I had to also confront the one I was in love with.

It doesn't matter to me if he doesn't return the feelings...

No, it does matter in a way it will hurt me.

But it doesn't matter in a way I at least won't let down my family.

If they ever found out I was in love with a boy, that'd be more tarnish on our family name.

No matter what I'd do would make up for it.

Well, at least in the family.

If I do go through with my dreams and admit my feelings, and in the unlikely event we're a couple, people outside my family wouldn't care.

Heck.

Many may even support it...

But that doesn't stop the sure disappointment from my family.

It's not as if he'd return my feelings though right?

Right.

Eventually, after finally accepting how I felt, my thoughts slowed.

I finally could rest.

I woke up the next morning.

Why was my vision blurry?

Why was my brain so foggy?

Why was everything so hard to process?

I only noticed a couple things.