Average Until Now

Chapter 7

3 days. I'm 3 days behind in my work because I couldn't handle a stupid crush. Being stuck in a white room wasn't so bad the first day, but it was at night when it was torture. Both nights I was kept awake by screams and crying that I have gotten used to, I have just assumed that this whole place is a torture prison that I unfairly was thrown into. I know I'm exaggerating but I cannot even imagine what those screams were.
The door knocks. In walks Daniel smiling as if he won the lottery, and I'm immediately grateful for him, otherwise I'd probably drive myself crazy. "Hey! Guess what... You can get out of this mini asylum right now!" I giggle... Literally giggle. He always knows how to make me feel somewhat sane. " Really? I'm so happy, I have to catch up on all my classes! I don't want to fail anything in the first quarter," I say quite honestly. He smiles even more and throws his head back in laughter, and then says " you are the only person wanting to get back to memorizing the bones." He then begins talking about some of the missed work I will no doubt be stressing about later. " Well? Let's get you out of this place," as he links his arm around mine and we go to the front to sign off my name with one of the nurses.
As we walked down the hall to my dorm I felt as if no one could look at anything other than me. Eyes followed every turn that I walked. I try so hard to fit in and I don't even fit in at a school where everyone has friends, I'm literally a disappointment to social skills. I turn the second to last corner when Daniel finally talks again, " this is my hall, see you soon?" I smile as confidently as I could try and continue walking to my room. I turn the last corner until my room and I gasp, almost forgetting to breathe.
Joshua was sitting in the middle of the hall playing with a bundle of twine. I can't help to do anything but to imagine them as puppet strings, ready to strangle me at any given moment. I take a deep breath and with all my little courage I walk to my room, and open the door, ignoring him. He's still across the narrow hall, now standing up. As I close the door I see his face, and our eyes lock. Suddenly the door across from mine opens, and a 10th grader lets Joshua in.
Jenn is looking at me as if I'm an alien, and starts asking questions as soon as I sit down. I don't tell her about Joshua or even Daniel. The more I think about it I truly am a sad movie character, the problem is I don't want to live like a character from High School Musical, I'm no Gabriella. Jenn stops asking questions, and I start reading a story in the book of myths for literature. The main character is both good and evil with dark eyes, and I can't help but think of Joshua and his eyes... Does he have a good side? Will he ever show it? Why am I the only one who ever thinks he's semi decent? Am I really just a naive teenage girl with hopeless daydreams?
I decide that since I have no hope focusing on homework now, I'll get my makeup work from my teachers. Math, history, science, the pile of work gets heavier in my hands.
The class I've been avoiding is right in front of me, what am I nervous about? Joshua is in that guy's room, and with that thought in my head I open the door. I exhale in relief when I don't see him in the room. " Hello honey, are you all right?" I nod assuringly. " I don't know how you are going to be caught up, though... This class isn't like the others. Maybe a tutor?" I actually think that might be a great idea, and I nod more enthusiastically. " Okay, I'll get Joshua to plan a schedule for tommorow and so on. " Before I realize what I have done, Ms. Kay nods and sends me out of the room. What have I done?
I bring my stack of papers to my room, after grabbing a granola bar to eat in my room. Instead of worrying about a boy, maybe two boys, I drown myself in math, history and science. Maybe I can drown in these papers instead of drowning in my problems, I wishfully think. If only I could be stuck in these papers, what a luxury indeed, instead of feeling like drowning in poison every time I see two black eyes. Two black eyes that might ruin my life, two eyes that belong to Joshua Hook.