I can't take it anymore, I'm sorry (Iwaoi and Sakuatsu Angst) [Discontinued ATM]

Chapter 30

Third-Person's POV

Atsumu looked at the two person asleep on Oikawa's bed before pouting and crawled between the two. He giggled slightly before closing his eyes and hugging Oikawa

Ushijima's eyes fluttered open facing Atsumu's back. He scanned the whole room before e sitting up and looking at the two figure deeply asleep

He chuckled a bit before pulling the blanket on top of Atsumu and Oikawa. He silently gets our of the bed and then out of the room

He lit the light in the kitchen and walked in front of the sink. He wore a gloves and started washing the dishes and cleaning up the table

He put the leftovers in the fridge then fixed the chairs. He heard a door open so he looked at where it came from

There he saw Atsumu tugging at the end of his T-shirt standing in front of Oikawa's door. "I-I'm sorry... Did I wake you up because of cuddling with You and Oikawa?"

Ushijima widen his eyes before shaking his head and walked towards Atsumu pulling him and sitting him down in one of the chairs

"Don't worry... I didn't wake up because of that, I'm already awake when you came in the room I just couldn't get out of there because I might wake up Oikawa"

My lying skills is getting better. Nice one Wakatoshi

"I-Is that so... I'm really sorry because of the drama I caused earlier, You couldn't even eat properly..."

Ushijima knealt in front of Atsumu before caressing his face the he smiled gently at him. "Don't worry about that... And i came here to help the both of you not just to enjoy"

"I came here for a purpose. Not just sweet fresh air"

"And... Atsumu be honest with... Do you still want to play Volleyball or are you just playing it because you don't want Oikawa to worry about you?"

Atsumu looked at Ushijima in surprise before gulping and looking down. "In trying to like it again... Really in trying... But no matter how hard I try to love volleyball again I just can't"

"Afterall it was the same sport that i always play with my twin, The same sports that made me met him, The same sports where I fell Inlove with him with, The sport that is the beginning and the end of the both of us"

"No matter how hard I try to find a reason to love it... The reason I came up with is to hate it more and more!! Specially the position of a setter! Volleyball for me now is just a curse dragging me down to the very pit of darkness"

"The love I have for it once is now turning into a Hatred and Regrets...!"

Slowly tears fell down Atsumu's face and his hands clenched into a fist unto which Ushijima slowly caress. "Atsumu... Is it Volleyball that you hate or the person you played it with? Sometimes like right now... You think that you hate something when in reality it's not a thing that you hate it's Someone or even worse you don't hate that person... You love him so much it's hurting you already"

"People sometimes says things like hating something because they can't admit that they're hurting badly because of someone... And that same person love that thing so much that you somehow just feels Hatred towards that thing"

"It's the same feelings you feel when you think you're Inlove in someone else when I reality you're just infatuated by them, It's not that you hate that thing... It's just that you're hurting because of the person who loves that thing"

"So I'm asking you right now... Do you hate Volleyball? Or, Are you hurting because of the person who loves Volleyball?"

Atsumu stayed quiet before falling unto Ushijima hugging him tightly. "I... I don't hate Volleyball, I don't hate it... It's just that I love Sakusa so much it's hurting me already and the fact that Sakusa loves Volleyball makes me feel Hatred towards Volleyball"

Ushijima patted Atsumu's back and kissed his forehead. "Atsumu... If you really love and treasure Volleyball then you won't let someone like him make you hate something you love. And Atsumu the fact that you know it yourself just means you're accepting things already..."

"Be proud of yourself... Acceptance is a path to your new beginning, Accepting the fact that you are still Inlove with Sakusa and you know that you're hurting badly because of him is part of acceptance. You're accepting the fact that you can never unlove Sakusa, But that doesn't mean you can't move on from him"

"Atsumu you've finally taken the step of acceptance and that's a good thing... Moving on from something takes alot of steps and pain. But no one is pressuring you to move on in a speed of light, We're taking it one step at a time and every step of that way you have both me and Oikawa on your back"

"I'm sure it will only be a bit of time until you start enjoying the things you once and newly love"

"Afterall the pain you have right now is the happiness you'll get later"

"And when that later comes... I'm sure your heart would be to overjoyed for you to even remember you had a wound"