Dreams

18

Kevin didn't have work that day. And perhaps that was good. It wasn't good that he should have worked more hours. That he could've gotten more money to pay for his tuition. Normal people who were strong and knew how to work could've done it just fine.

But at least in this case, being able to sit in the back of his classes, and then go home, and retreat into his shell, helped him calm his emotions, even if he was calming them to be comfortable in his sinful state.

By the time he got a text from Amy, saying that she was at the door, he was just grateful that he wasn't a bawling idiot.

"Hey Kevin!" Amy greeted as he opened the door.

"Hi."

"How was your day?" she asked as Kevin closed the door.

"Pretty good," he lied.

"That's good to hear," she smiled. "I had a good day too."

He sat down on one of the couches in the living room, and she joined him.

"I ordered a pizza," he said, "and it should be here in a few minutes."

"Cool."

Silence. Augh. He hated gaps in conversation. Should he start the movie? Should he make small talk?

"Any of your roommates around?" Amy asked.

He shook his head. "No, my brother will be at work for a few more hours. My other roommates are probably off hanging out with someone."

"So you room with your brother?" Amy asked.

"No, I have a private room."

"That must be nice."

"Sometimes it is," Kevin said. "Sometimes it's not."

"Well you have a nice place," she complimented.

"Thanks," Kevin said. "I like it a lot more than living on campus."

"Oh, living on campus isn't terrible," Amy said, "but I do agree, it's nice to have things be a bit larger."

"And have more than one bathroom."

Amy laughed. "That's definitely a plus."

There was a knock at the door, indicating the arrival of their pizza. Kevin went to the door and got it from the girl delivering it, then set it down on the table.

"Is plain pepperoni fine?"

"Yeah," Amy said.

"Okay, there's soda in the kitchen if you want it."

She followed him into the kitchen, and from the options of mountain dew, sprite, and root beer, they both got root beer.

And finally, they sat down, and Kevin got the movie up. He briefly agonized over how close was appropriate to sit next to Amy. Sitting to close would be weird, but too far away might send a different message.

But didn't he want to sit closer? Wasn't that the message that he wanted to send?

Wait. Was it? Did he want to say that he liked her?

Kevin felt a slight chill inside. When he had gone on dates with girls before, he had felt a very surface level attraction to them. He thought some of them were cute, and so that's why he asked them out. But for the first time, he was feeling something a bit more.

Cautiously, he moved a bit closer to her, disguising it as just shifting around to get more comfortable. She didn't move away. They were touching slightly.