UNCONDITIONALLY YOURS

If we were more // 24

He suggested that we put some TV on, and once again I found myself cuddled against him on his sofa. I didn't know exactly how it happened, but he made me feel safe. He always added brightness to the darkest of times, and in that moment, I really needed him.

He didn't even say anything, he just pulled me into a comfortable position and held me. It wasn't even awkward, it felt comfortable and it made me feel safe. Nothing mattered quite as much when I was in his arms.

As unfamiliar as I was with these kinds of emotions, I wasn't dim and I knew that I didn't think of him as just a friend, or just support. I just didn't know exactly how to deal with that. We watched TV like that for a long time, and we also began chatting after that.

"Can I ask you something?" I said.

"Anything." He smiled.

"What was your past like? I've been blabbering on about myself, but I never asked you. I mean, you've never mentioned your parents and you are pretty young to have a business as big as your own. Why did you set it up, and how did you get the money to start it?"

As we had been talking, I had realised that before I knew him, I was always curious about how he started a business like his own. But I never even got round to asking him anything like that, so I decided to take the opportunity. The seemingly casual question became a lot heavier as countless unreadable emotions scatter his face instantly. I noticed how selfish I had been, talking about my past when is looked like maybe he didn't have it the easiest either. He took a moment, but eventually spoke.

"It's nothing I'm in the mood to get into right now. My mum passed away a while ago, it was tough, but I got through it. I never really had a father; well biologically, sure, but he was never a father to me or a partner for my mum. But he died and it turned out he had a lot of money. It was probably illegally earned, but there wasn't much I could do about that. I started my business because... don't worry. There's not much more that's important."

He finished and I instantly felt a wave of guilt submerge me. I put my hand on his chin and directed his gaze to me.

"I'm so sorry. All I ever did was go on about me, but you didn't have it easy either." I apologised wholesomely.

"It's OK. It doesn't compare to what you went through. Since then, I've had it pretty great. And I never had a problem with being betrayed, alone or having no freedom. Don't compare my life to what you had go through."

We silently embedded ourselves in each other's gaze. They say eyes are like windows, and in that moment we both acted like they were. I explored his emerald eyes and I saw through him. I saw sympathy, a little pain, guilt, power, caring and so much more. I thought we may be about to kiss again, but my idiotic self destroyed the moment with my curious mind.

"Why didn't you want to tell me about why you started your-" I began.

"We've been sitting here for ages; it's getting late and you've had a long day." He changed the subject, leaving me guessing but I knew better than to press it too much. I thought I could trust him. He didn't seem like someone that would keep anything big from me and it was probably only a small thing he didn't feel like talking about.

"OK. If it's alright, I don't really want to go home, not right now at least. I'm just still feeling a bit..." I swallowed as I managed to remind myself of how my dreams had just crumbled before my eyes, and Parker's work to distract me was thrown away. He noticed, as usual, pulled me against his chest and hugged me tightly.

"Hey, it's OK gorgeous. Of course, you can. Just don't think about it, alright?" Gorgeous? I sniffed as I had suddenly become even more emotional. I think it took me a while to realise I couldn't work at my beautiful café anymore but when I really thought about it, it hit hard.

He showed me to a beautiful guest bedroom that look almost completely unused. He checked if it was alright countless times, before leaving me to sleep. He left me the same shorts from Summer that I had borrowed last time and his hoodie, and also promised to buy me some clothes to sleep in if I was going to make it a regular occurrence to which I rolled my eyes once again.

I tucked myself under the covers and accidentally caught a smell of the hoodie I was wearing. It smelt like Parker again. Even though I was still upset, and my mind was pretty frantic, I eventually drifted off to sleep.

It was like a creature. Like some restless beast that had trapped me, and there was no escape. No matter which direction I turned, I was faced which the same inescapable fate portrayed in glowing clusters of yellow and orange tones. The fire was raw, and had the energy, power and potential of lion. I felt myself begin to perspire for the shear heat as it crept closer and closer to me. I was utterly panicked, but I had no options. All I could do was sit and pray. Pray that someone could hear my desperate thoughts and save me from what was seemingly the end of the road. No one could save me because no one cared enough to risk their own life for someone as useless and unloved as myself. I felt my fingertips burning as the agonising blazes narrowed in from all directions. I could hear screams, and they gradually became clearer until I could almost workout what they were saying... clearer... clearer...

"Riley...Riley? Riley..."

"Riley!" I jumped and I suddenly sat up, finding myself back in the room I went to sleep in, Parker's guest bedroom. My hands were clammy. "Are you OK, Thunder?" Parker asked, perched on the edge of the bed and his hand gently behind my head so I was resting on it.

"Sorry, what happened?" I asked as I rubbed my eyes and tried to get a grip on my surroundings.

"You were dreaming. I walked past your room to get some water, and I could hear you groaning like you were trying to say something. You then started muttering 'help' whilst tossing and turning so I thought I should wake you. What happened?" That was a bit embarrassing. I had nightmares fairly often. It was always something that bothered me more than I let on, but what could I do? Usually, it was just me, so I had to ignore it.

"Shoot. I get it a lot, don't worry about it. I was dreaming about... you know how I told you about the house fire? Yeah that. I get it sometimes, sorry." I explained. My heart ached a little every time I had a dream like that. The fire has shaken me up a lot, I thought I was going to die, and I had never had the same realisation that I was alone in the world before. It only got worse from then.

"Don't apologise." He said, frankly. "I'll get back to bed if you like... just promise to get me if you have problem." As he began to walk away, I couldn't refrain myself from catching his hand and pulling him back. I hopped up and jumped to him, wrapping my arms around his neck and my legs around his torso. He instantly held my back up. I hung my head over his shoulder and whispered to him.

"I'm sor... I mean, please could you stay? You don't have to, I just... todays been a lot, and this has shaken me up a little if I'm going to be entirely honest with you."

"Whatever you like, gorgeous." Again, with that nickname. It made me cringe even to admit to myself, but I had never shared a bed with a guy like that before. Ben wasn't supportive and he wouldn't share a bed with a girl unless I slept with him and seeing as I subconsciously thought of him as a friend that never happened. I didn't mention that of course, however. Somehow it wasn't awkward at all. He hugged me just like he did on the sofa and it made less difference that I had expected. It was only because of Parker's confidence and how straight forward he was that it wasn't at all awkward. Instead of uncomfortably lying next to each other, he just put an arm around me whilst lying close to me and acted completely natural about it.

"Riley, can I ask you something?" He murmured in my ear.

"Go for it." I answered and I could hear him sigh and he seemed to be preparing himself.

"Will you be my girlfriend?"