SPACES | 𝘯. 𝘩𝘰𝘳𝘢𝘯 (book 3) ✔

Chapter 126: July.

['Cause you remind me every day
I'm not enough, but I still stay]

      It's been a couple days of staying at Louis'. Luckily, Via was doing so much better. I cleaned around the room Via and I were staying in while Louis made breakfast. I honestly didn't know how else to repay him with. I sat down on the bed, grabbing my phone. I turned on the screen, finding the photo Niall, Via and I took on Halloween. No messages or calls from him covered the photo. I felt my eyes sting the longer I stared at the photo. I went to my settings and changed the photo to a photo of the rest of the boys with Via without Niall. I sighed, getting up and walked out of the bedroom.

      "Hey, you okay?" Louis looked at me as he held Via in his arms. 

      I smiled, nodding. "Yeah, I'm fine." I reassured. 

      "Okay, well, I made eggs and bacon." He spoke, turning back to the stove. While we ate, he held Via and I was happy about the fact that Via loved the boys. If she didn't, there would've been a problem with that. I ate quietly while Louis messed around with Via and made her smile widely. The idea of Via about to turn two months was crazy to me. On December 8th, it'd already be two months with my little girl. It felt like yesterday I was annoying everyone that I wanted her out already. I giggled at the thought. 

      After breakfast, I washed dishes since Louis cooked and sighed afterwards. I wanted to go home, I really did, but knowing that Niall was there and Stacey was there, I didn't want Via around them, especially since Niall and I aren't getting along so well right now. It'd be better to go back until Niall and I have solved things and not fought around Via. It took a long list of pros and cons until I decided that we'd just go home. I didn't want Via to be getting used to the feeling of sleeping at a different house every other night. I might as well take her home and stay there. 

      On the way home, I made a pit stop to Yomara's. Now that Via was doing better with only a stuffy nose now and then, I knew she wouldn't get anyone as sick as we would think. I only hope that she didn't get Louis or Harry sick. When I parked by the curb, I let out a long sigh and let my head fall back against the seat. With this entire mess, I never felt more mentally exhausted like now. I felt tired and emotionally drained. I wanted to be a good mother for Via, but with Niall and me screaming at each other and at each other's throats all the damn time, it felt impossible to without doubting myself.

      I finally got out of the car and got Via before locking the car and going up to the door. I walked in quietly, shutting the door and putting my keys into my pocket. "Yomara?" I called out, walking further into the house. She appeared with Ashton at her side. "Hey." I sighed.

      "Hey, you okay?" She asked, coming up to me and hugging me. 

      "Just tired." 

      "Sit on the couch, I'll go get something for you." She said softly, walking away and Ashton following me to the couch.

      "Hey, buddy." I smiled, hugging Ashton after setting down Via. Soon enough, Yomara came back with a donut and a glass of water. 

      "Go play with your toys, I have to talk to Nina." Yomara told him, sitting beside me. Ashton obliged, walking out of the living room and down the hall. She looked back at me, handing me the sweet. "What's going on?" She asked.

      I sniffed, trying to prevent the tears that were threatening to fall. "I... I don't know what to do with Niall anymore, Yomara." I admit. "I've been trying to be the girlfriend he wants while still taking care of Via, but every time that I seem to try... He just snaps at me and makes me feel so terrible." I told her, letting my tears finally fall. 

      "I don't know why you're still with him, Em. He obviously isn't a good dad for Via and-"

      "I can't, Yomara." I shook my head. "We planned this entire future where we'd be a happy family with a couple kids and he promised that he'd be there, Yomara." I cried.

      "Emily." She said. "If he meant it, he wouldn't have brought that bitch." I chuckled sadly, letting her go on and looked down to my lap. "He doesn't deserve you or Via. We haven't seen you smile ever since you got pregnant, Em. Have you noticed that?" I sighed, looking back up at her. "I know that those smiles you gave were fake, Emily."

      "I hate that you can see right through me." I muttered. 

      "Yeah, but if I didn't, I wouldn't be able to tell you this." She placed her hand on my shoulder. "Look, the spare room is always open, Emily. You know it is."

      I nodded, "I know." 

      "Em, I know you want the best for Via, just like I want the best for you, and if that means that you and Niall shouldn't be together, don't you think that should be it?"

      I shook my head, "I can't end things. Via needs her dad."

      "Her excuse of a dad?"

      I couldn't break this family. I know that what Niall's doing isn't great, but what if things get better and I didn't let it go on for the good to come out? I can't let Via go back and forth between me and Niall. It'll break her and I can't even imagine the look on her face if she ever asks me why her parents don't live in the same house like kids in her class. How would I respond to that?

      "The rainbow comes after the storm, doesn't it?"

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[July - Noah Cyrus]

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A/N:

emily.. sweetie.. no

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All the love, C. xx