Thanatos
The God of death, the God everyone loathes, and yet the one everyone longs for at the end, the God they cling too, seek comfort in, the God all the others forget about and yet... Olympus itself would fall without him.
He's lonely... under...
"She didn't want love, she wanted to be loved- and that was entirely different"
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• Thanatos •
No one prepared anyone for grief, I have seen many reactions over the years The shock, the rage, the acceptance But even in acceptance, the surprise is still there, coming to terms with the fact it was actually happening.
I had witnessed it, too many times But I had never experienced it, because I had never lost anybody I had never had anyone to lose in the first place.
But right now... I felt it hit me. Like a thousand waves drowning me I felt like I was unable to breathe, there was no air, no comprehension of what just happened She kissed me. She actually kissed me And I froze... I froze like the fates had stopped time, stopped me, had rerouted destiny.
Her lips, her dainty little hands holding onto me, pouring all her emotions into one single kiss and I felt the fire run through my veins. The yearning for her. The shock.
And then... she pulled away. And it was a different shock that ran through me One so fearful and soul consuming as she had backed away from me rambling apologies The hope was smashed The look in her eyes of utter shame that she had just done it.
And then... Moros Asking her to be his date again. And she stood there, talking to him as if she had not just crushed my soul. I tried to remain calm, to keep my focus on the painting and disregard what had just happened Like she was so easily doing.
But I felt broken. She kissed me, she did the one thing I had been desiring for years, and I failed to react. I did not move, I did... I did not kiss her back Show her how much she completely overcame me How much I wanted her. Needed her.
And now... I have lost her. When I had never had her She had never been mine. So why does it feel like my heart was broken? We witness love everyday on earth, the smiles, the sweet nothings, the roses And the heartbreak.
The tears... the pain. The physical need to breakdown I understood it now I thought it hurt before, when she would smile at someone else, when she turned away from me Whenever she was not near me But now... now I felt destroyed.
Wiped away in an oblivion of rejection But why did she kiss me? It must have been in the moment Because the expression on her angelic features, the horror at the act she had just committed, and the way she was still staring at the door, unable to turn around and look at me.
She hated me. She did not want me here anymore I would never be able to face her again after this.
"Thanatos" she muttered, still staring at the door I gripped the paintbrush harder, staring at the paper before me and wishing it could set on fire Wishing I could take the anger at myself out on something.
