Scared to love

The truth hurts.

I was currently getting ready for Harry to come over. I put some black skinny jeans and a light blue shirt that's a little to big so it slides down my shoulder a bit. Once I'm done I go downstairs to see my mom making a glass of water. "Hey mom." I say. "Ugh hey Shea." She says in an exhausted tone. She used my nickname from back when I was a kid. "What's wrong mom?" I say. "I just really really want something to drink or maybe something to smoke and it's really hard once you get through the first few days" she says before running a hand through her hair much like me when I'm frustrated "Is there something I can do to help?" I ask trying to prevent my new sober mom from disappearing. "Just keep me away from that achool cabinet and your dad will keep me away from the drugs. Just don't let me get close to that cabinet no matter what happens." She says not really sure if what she's saying. "Um okay mom good luck today." I say reassuring her that she can do this. "Have fun cooking I'll be in one of the guest rooms all day because I'm not feeling to good." She says grabbing her glass of water. "Okay mom." I say as she walks away.

...

Harry arrives right at 12 noon like he said he would. I let him in and show him around. First I show him my room then the rest of my big house until we finally get to the kitchen. "Time to getting cooking." He says while rubbing his hands togather. "Let's get started." I say as I go to the kitchen and grab the supplies.

...

Once we were done making the tacos we were putting them in a big container to save for tomorrow when we have the whole meal ready. We both went to put a taco in and our hands touched. I looked up at him to see his beautiful green eyes. They were captivating and I couldn't look away. I never noticed before how truly handsome harry really was.

"What are you kids doing in here." My dad says walking into the kitchen. Our eyes immediately lost contact and we continues putting tacos in the container. "Just putting away tacos dad." I said grabbing another taco. My father walks in eyes harry and says "this isn't your boyfriend right." "No this is just my friend harry." I say glancing at harry who seems a little nervous I guess from meeting my dad. "Good because if it was I would have to kick his ass." He says while grabbing the phone and the phone book. "Harry's your friend he should know. I mean it's so wrong what he's doing, I mean any real man knows you don't hit a women." Shit shit shit. "Dad just let's stop talking about it." I say looking at harry who seems confused. "He did what." Harry says confusion quickly turning to anger. "Harry it's fine ju-" "you lied to me you said it was nothing." He looks at me with a hurt expression and anger. He walks out of the kitchen I'm guessing to calm down so he doesn't flip out in front of my dad.

My dad just kind of stands there looking almost proud. "I'm just going to take a wild guess and say that that boy cares about you and you need to tell him the truth the whole truth before he finds out from Sam." I guess I could tell him some of it. "Your right dad I'll be back."

I get outside to see harry sitting in his car banging his hands on the wheel. I'm scared to tell him because he chould react like Sam and hit me or think I'm dumb but something is telling me he won't do that. So I open the passenger door and take a seat. "H-harry." I say calmly. He doesn't answer he just looks out the window. "I think it's time for me to be honest with you and I don't know why you care so much about me but it's because you care that I'm going to tell you the truth if you'll just listen to me." I say almost pleadingly. "What is his f.ucking problem I should've beat his ass today in English class he would've deserved it even more now that I know the f.ucking truth. F.UCK." He yells pounding on the steering wheel. All the sudden I feel small and weak and flashbacks of Sam hitting me play in my head. "P-please d-don't hurt m-me." I say fearfully. Harry immediately relaxs and looks at me. "I would never hurt you Shane." He says than he goes to grab my hands but I flinch. He gently grabs them anyway trying to ignore the evident pain my flinching away caused him. I saw it in his eyes and in the way he looked hurt. He looks into my eyes his filled with meaningfulness. "I'm so sorry I yelled and I'm sorry I scared you but no matter how angry I am I will never ever hit a women especially not you. I don't know why I'm getting so worked up over this but just thinking of him hitting you and how scared you seem of him hurts me." He says still using those beautiful green eyes to show me he means every word that came out of his mouth.

"I'm sorry I lied but it's not the easiest thing to say because I know that once i tell you, your going to think I'm pathetic and stop caring about me." I say meaning every word. "I promise i will listen to you and try my best not to get mad but I promise you that no matter what you say to me in the next few minutes I will never think your pathetic." He says. "Okay we'll let me just start from when it all started." He nodded releasing both of my hands just to take one of his and link it with mine to give me some courage to tell him. "Well it was maybe a month ago and Sam just finished football practice we came back to my house to hang out but once we got to my room he pushed me against the wall and started making out with me. At first I thought that's all we were going to do until he started unbuttoning my jeans. Once I realized his intentions I stopped him because I'm a virgin and we had only been dating for like 2 weeks at the time. I told him I wasn't ready and he basically flipped out on me saying how he hadn't had sex in 2 weeks and if I didn't give it to him soon he was going to go to someone else to get it. I got mad and it turned into a screaming match then I told him I would break up with him if he cheated on me. We'll he didn't like that so he grabbed my arms extremely tight and pushed me against the wall. He started yells at me and saying that he can f.uck who he wants and that we won't break up until he says to." I took a deep breath. Harry had a mix of sarrow, hatred, and pity written all over his face. "Over the weekend me and Sam got in this huge fight he was drunk and the fight got really bad so I left." I know I'm lying to him but I'm not ready to tell anyone that he forced himself on me. "On Monday I just figured we broke up but I was wrong and he got mad and I accused him of doing some things and he acted all innocent like he would never do such a thing. He was hugging me and being all sweet and then all the sudden he got mad that I thought so badly of him so h-he umm h-he uh he h-hit me." I said as fresh tears started running down my cheek as I remembered him beating me. Harry can't know how bad it really was I don't want him to piss Sam off because it will just get worse. "P-please p-promise me you won't say anything h-harry. H-he will just get m-mad and then it will get w-worse."

I looked over at harry to see his eyes watery. He was biting his lip I'm guessing so he wouldn't cry. I will never understand why he cares so much guys aren't supposed to care right? At least that's my experience with Sam and my father, until just recently when my parents decided to give a shit about their daughter. "I can't promise you I won't beat the shit out of him but I can promise you that I will try not to say or do anything if you promise me something." He said. "Promise you what?" I said in confusion.

"Promise me that if he ever hurts you again that you will tell me even if your not at home or at school just tell me where you are and I'll come get you and I'll beat his ass if you ever allow me too. Okay." He says looking in my eyes I thought about it for a second, he wants to be my hero why should I deny him.

"You promise."

"I promise."

***

I changed the timeline a bit so after Sam tried to have s.ex with her there's like a month and then they go to that party okay.

Sorry that took so long to update but I had a bit of writers block but it's gone now and I have lots of ideas for this story.

Tell all your friends about my story or as Harry's would say

"Spread the word."

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