outcast || dreamnotfound ||

sympothy

chapter tws: sh mention, starving mention, suicidal thoughts

it's been about 6 and a half days since sapnap left.

george sits on his bed crying with bad next to him, bad feeling helpless because he didn't know how to help.

he still sits in sapnap's hoodie.

he hadn't showered since sapnap left, and the only thing he had ate was a pack of crackers, which was rare when he did.

his wrists that collected more scars every day.

he doesn't know how he'll begin to tell sapnap everything, or if he ever would.

he was scared that sapnap was dead.

"bad, i can't deal with it anymore, what if he's dead. what if he's never coming back."

"i'm sure he will george, have some patience."

george grabs his notebook and pen like always.

"i wanna die i wanna die i wanna die i wanna die i wanna die i wanna die. i never want to see the world again. he's probably dead and it's all my fault. what an idiot. shouldn't i be dead." he writes.

he closes his notebook before going back to crying, that was only partly about his thoughts.

"i need him back."

"george! what if he's on his way back right now? you don't know."

"what if he isn't though."

bad sighs.

"bad, everything in my life is going wrong, first my feelings for dream, i lost my fucking chance 3 months ago, and then my mom. she was one of the closest people to me and she died. she fucking died."

"language." bad whispers.

george sighs.

"is there any way that we can contact sapnap." george asks.

"no, sadly."

"oh."

"you just have to wait george, he'll come back and everything will be better."

"but every day is no different Bad. im crying everyday, not eating, hurting myself, theres no difference. theres no fun to life anymore Bad."

bad sighs.

"i need sapnap here. i'd pay anything to be able to find him. i need him right now Bad."

"have patience george."

"it's too hard to."

"everything hurts too much and only sapnap was able to calm me down."

george looks at his lap before smelling his hoodie, still smelling like sapnap.

if only he could come back right now, like just magically appear.

if only he could protect sapnap somehow.

if only he could've came with sapnap, to make sure that he was okay.

george leaves his room and sits on the couch.

Bad follows him.

it's a cold afternoon, sleet falling from the sky.

he turns on the TV.

he tries to distract himself but it doesn't work.

"what if he doesn't make it back. what if he's dead right now." george sighs.