Touch Starved

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Markiplier is streaming: UA Q&A with EEF

Things were going fine. There were some questions generally about Unus Annus, some were related to Mark and Ethan, some just Mark and others just Ethan.

But then, there was a question Ethan never thought would be asked.

--why do marks hands seem so big ajdhakdjs, can we get a hand comparison?

"Why is that a thing people want to see?" Ethan asked, giggling nervously.

Mark chuckled. "My hands aren't that big. But, the people want what they want."

Mark held his hand up for Ethan, and instinctively Ethan met his hand.

Sparks went through Ethan's fingertips.

Shocked, Ethan put his hand back.

"You ok?"

"Y-Yeah, sorry, I don't know what happened." His hand met Mark's yet again.

The sparks came back.

But this time, Ethan kept his hand there, through Mark's electrifying touch.

When Mark drifted his hand away, the touch lingered.

"Your hands are big..." he muttered, giggling slightly.

"Are they? I think yours are just tiny."

Ethan chuckled, trying to ignore the lingering heat he felt in his hands.

---

They were playing Five Nights At Freddy's 3.

Mark was dying on the 5th night, as he does.

Ethan was mostly there for moral support, even though they were both supposed to be playing.

Mark had died 5 times now, maybe 6. On Night 5 alone.

And then, it happened.

"Fuck you Balloon Boy-" Mark said, immediately after teasing as another ghost jumpscare occured. "Fuckk youuu Bonnie Bitch"

All the systems needed rebooting. Mark was so focused on that, that even when Ethan exclaimed "Mark, Springtrap is there!" he simply said "I gotta fix the fuckin-"

He cut himself off with a scream. "JESUS FUCK AFTON YOU PURPLE MOTHERFUCKER" He yelled, throwing his chair back and almost falling.

Almost, if Ethan hadn't been there to break his fall.

Mark just laid there for a second, panting.

Ethan was frozen in shock.

His entire body heated up, starting with all the points of contact between the two men, and ending with his cheeks, which were now a nice shade of crimson.

Ethan glanced frantically between the camera and Mark. What the fuck does he do?

He gingerly wrapped his arm around Mark's torso, starting to pat his head. "Aww Mark, are you okay?" he asked, not only acting for the camera, but for Mark as well.

Mark confusedly got up. "Uh, yeah man, 'm fine."

He fucked up. Oops.

---

Ethan knocked all the stuff of his bed in a fit of frustration, flopping onto it as tears flowed from his eyes.

"Why doesn't anything ever fucking work!" he yelled, thinking he was home alone.

He wasn't home alone.

Mark had come to give him his charger back from his place, as Ethan had accidentally taken one of his that didn't work.

Big mistake, as said charger was the cherry on top of all the minor things making Ethan want to scream.

But instead of seeing Ethan, sitting on the couch or petting Spencer, he saw nobody.

And heard crying from upstairs.

He walked up the stairs carefully, not wanting to run and risk Ethan getting scared that someone was in his house.

Slowly approaching the door to Ethan's room, he knocked. "Ethan? I'm coming in."

He opened the door, much to Ethan's protest, and walked in.

"Mark, please, I'm okay, go away."

"No, you're not okay, you're crying."

He sat next to Ethan on the bed.

"Can I touch you or is that too much right now?"

Ethan hesitated. At least he had time to mentally prepare.

Slowly, he nodded his head, and there was a hand on the small of his back.

There the feeling was again.

"Deep breaths, Eth. 4-7-8, remember? You're okay, I'm here."

Ethan tried to do as Mark said, but his touch was overwhelming him. He jumped slightly when Mark takes his hand.

"It's okay, I'm not going to hurt you." Slowly, Mark places Ethan's hand on his chest. "Can you match my breathing? In and out, it's okay..."

Ethan nodded, and slowly his breathing returned to normal.

"Sor-" he tried speaking, but his hoarse voice led him into coughing instead. "Sorry," he tried again, "I don't think that's what you wanted to see when you came over..."

"Are you okay? You've seemed really off lately, I'm worried."

There it was. The dreaded confession. Fuck.

"Uh, yeah, I just..." Ethan trailed off, trying to figure out a way to put his feelings into words.

"Take your time, don't worry." Mark added, knowing his ADHD wouldn't allow for a quick response.

"I don't know why, but everytime I touch you, I get a really weird hot tingly feeling that goes through my entire body, kinda like I got shocked by something, but not painful? and like, it's not sexual, I just realized it could be taken that way, it's not, it just feels nice, but then sometimes I don't expect it and it's really overwhelming and I don't know what's going on but I don't like it." Ethan said quickly without taking a breath.

Mark chuckled a little bit, taking a second to process the information before nodding in understanding. "Ethan," he asked curiously, "when was the last time you were hugged?"

"Uhhh, would it be bad if I said that I don't remember?"

Mark sighed. "Ethan, you're just touch starved, you know you need more physical affection."

Ethan nodded slowly. "Okay...how do I fix it? I don't want to get all tingly whenever I'm touched."

Mark slowly took Ethan, and placed him in his lap. He wrapped his arms around Ethan's smaller frame. "We start by you letting yourself be touched more. I know the bit was always 'Don't touch me,' but it's okay to need physical contact."

Ethan nodded yet again. "O-Okay, I can do that. Can you-" he hesitated, "Can you stay the night for a bit? I don't want to be alone..."

Mark kissed his cheek, a soft look of reassurance in his eyes. "Of course."

And for once, Ethan felt safe in someone's arms.

WC: 1015

im so so sorry this took forever to get updated, my hyperfixation on them like died after ua ended and now brain is stuck on karl jacobs so if you start getting dream smp content, youre welcome, but also sorry for leaving the fandom. after a few drafts and requests are complete im probably going to mostly abandon this book, because my brain rlly said no <3 ajkfhdsjgf

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⏰ Last updated: Oct 26, 2021 ⏰

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