Smile- One direction story

Part 11

Lisa's POV:

My legs were moving without my brain knowing where. I was just running. I wanted to get away from Louis, from all my problems. 

"Running away won’t change anything!"

Louis' words yelled again. Maybe it doesn't change anything but I can postpone them for later. I always do. I can't deal with everyhing at the moment. My mom hating me. The fact that I will never see her again. Me moving to another city. Going to new school. Having new friends. And now Louis in love with me?!?! Noo! I can't deal with all of that right now!

"There is nothing here that says what we have is only friendship Lisa!" 

I remembered his eyes locked on mine. His gruff voice and his touch as he was coming closer to me. The words he was saying so full of hope that for a moment I wanted, with everything in me, to believe him. But I couldn’t. Then his lips as he'd pressed them against mine with such urgency. That caused a whole new sense of self-hatred in me and into my senses when I found myself pulling back. I just couldn't stay. I didn't want that. Or maybe I did...

"I fucking care about you!" 

I couldn’t hush the memory of his last echoing words. It was still there, loud and clear, and the realisation of the helplessness behind the words he spoke was all that it took for me to break. I didn't have the strength anymore. The pain mounted violently up my chest, escaping as tears. I realised I care about him too. He I did feel something more than just friendship for him. With Anne, Rob and Harry, he was the one that made these past two weeks bearable. If it wasn't for him, his jokes, his smile, his laugh, his beautifull eyes and him making me laugh to forget about all the pressure about moving and my mom, I would break a long time ago. 

I finally stoped walking. I looked around but couldn't see anything. My eyes were blurry and I could only imagine how I look from all the tears. I was breathing uneven, first 'cuz of fast walking, second 'cuz of crying. I blinked few times and I got my sight back. I looked around again and my body numbed. I was standing in coldness and darkness of a park. I put my hands over my chest as a reflex. It was cold and snow started falling even more and I started shaking and my teeth were chattering. I turned back and started walking the way I came from. I could hardly see the street lights in the distance, I just knew that was a path for me to go. After making few steps I heard footsteps behind me. The pressure of my hands on my chest got tighter and my heart started beating so hard I swear I could hear it. As I started walking faster I could hear the footsteps behind me getting quieter. I loosen up a bit when I felt someone's hands on my shoulder, turning me around to face it. I had my eyes closed and didn't want to look at what was chasing me but I had to force myself onto looking. I opened my eyes carefully and saw an older man, gray hair and long gray beard. He looked homeless. When I finally got my sences back I felt something cold on my neck. I looked down, without moving my head, and saw a sharp, silver little knife on my neck. 

"I know you have money! Give it to me!" he yelled and I felt a smell of alcohol burning on my face. 

"I don't have anything. I left my bag..."

"Give me what you have!"

"But I don't have anything, please don't hurt me, I really have nothing with me right now!" I started crying again. My life really did flash in my head. I saw mostly Louis and Eric. I didn't want to die. I can't leave Eric alone, I can't leave him after our mom did the same thing! I can't leave before saying what I realised tonight....I care for Louis! I really do! And I can't leave before telling him that! 

"Leave her alone!!!!!!!!" I heard behind me. The man's eyes opened wide and he removed the knife from my neck but as he did I felt a sharp pain in my stomach. It was the pain I never felt before. It lasted only for a moment before it got even more unbearable. I couldn't stand on my feet anymore. I collapsed on the cold ground. The voices I heard around me were in a far distance. I was only concentrated on my pain. My hands were on my stomach and I felt.....a hole in it!!!! I started to panic and with one of my arms I tryed to remove a lock of hair that got on my face and then I saw it......I saw my hand.....my palm full of blood. That was the 'it point' for me. I can't stand blood. The last thing I remember is my eyes getting blurry again and my thoughts fading away.