disgust (roceit)

warm

omigodddd a chapterrrrr

Roman's Pov:

Logan glanced down the hall as I walked to where he sat.

"how is he?"

I breathed, tugging at the bottom of my sash.

Logan fixated his glasses before answering.

"Well. He seems to be rather impatient in his current state. He tried to leave on multiple occasions. But other than that, he seems to be doing better with the rest he is getting. It may be of service to you and him to try to take him on a walk, without his cane. See how he does."

Nodding curtly, I peeked my head into the room, attempting to see if Janus was awake. His eyes stared intently in my direction, his face painted with boredom.

"Took you long enough."

He stated dryly before taking a sip of water.

"How are you feeling?"

I asked, dodging his remark as I walked over to the bed.

"Well enough to walk?"

A smirk plastered itself on the deceitful side's face.

"And here I thought you liked spending time with me."

Janus said pouting, a humorous glimmer in his eyes, despite the evident exhaustion. I huffed at the sarcasm littering his features.

"Good enough to jab at least. Do you want to try getting up?"

I said, extending my hand. He glanced at it nervously before nodding, clutching it gingerly.

Some part of me, upon seeing him like this, wondered why I ever hated him in the first place. Perhaps I needed a villain, and he simply stepped into the role, or rather, I forced him into that role. Another part of me couldn't handle the fact that in some twist of fate, I had become the villain in everyone else's stories. In my closed mindedness I had made everything so much harder, not just for him, but for Thomas too.

"You okay there?"

Janus said, snapping me out of my thoughts.

"Yeah sorry just thinking"

I sighed, Pulling him up gently. He grasped my arms in a desperate attempt not to fall, pulling me into a rather awkward hug, his eyes clamped tightly. I tried to tame the blush growing on my face. 

Not the place or time Roman.... he is cute though. I cringed at my thoughts, shaking my head in a fetal attempt to dismiss my scattered emotions.

"Hey now, your okay."

I whispered gently, rubbing the sides (>:3) of his arms. He relaxed slightly opening his eyes, finally realizing our closeness.

"Oh. I'm terribly sorry."

Janus said, pulling away. Much to my surprise, he started to giggle, soon erupting into full blown laughter. It scared me how much the sight warmed my heart.

"Sorry s-he-sorry it's just"

He breathed between the fits of giggling.

"It's just so horribly awkward."

"Hmm, is that so?"

 I mused, a warm smile easing its way across my face. We stood there for a moment, drinking in the warm energy of each others presence. For once, there finally seemed to be peace, no grudge or heartbreak clawing at the edge of every moment. It felt almost perfect.

And as we all have to realize at some point, some perfect things, don't last. I desperately wanted to pause the world in this moment, to stay in this comfortable atmosphere for the rest of my days.

My heart ached as Janus pulled away from the embrace, leaving me feeling cold. A trace of amusement still glimmered in his mischievous eyes as reality caved back in.

I wanted to grab his hand, to trace every scale on his tired face, to tell him he mattered. Hell, to tell him I loved him. but the time wasn't right. The time might never be right, my heart argued. But for once, I decided to follow my head. allowing the adoration to seep into the concaves of my mind.

It would have to wait.