disgust (roceit)

Aren't we friends?

(Might get sad IDK)

Janus's POV:

I plopped my face down on my bed, sighing heavily. Turning my head, I looked up at my clock that rested on the bed side table. The time read 5:00. I sighed in frustration. Why couldn't this day just end already. 

Thoughts of the past few days whirled through my brain mercilessly. My chest tightened and I let out a choked sob. 

Why was I crying. What reason do I have to feel sad. It would all be over soon anyways.

I heard a knock at the door.

"Doors open."

I heard the door creak open and shut, foot steps shuffled over towards me and I felt a weight sit on the end of the bed.

Silence ensued for an uncomfortable length of time, an anxious air about the room.

"What is it that you needed Virgil." 

I said without looking up.

More silence.

I heard him sigh.

"Listen. I'm just gonna get to the point. ..."

He shifted in dis-comfort.

"...Remus told me about... well.. everything."

I looked over my shoulder. Sighing I sat up.

"...everything everything?"

He nodded. I gave him a skeptical look, crossing my arms.

"...I know you're... I-I know your fading, Janus"

I looked him in the eyes, of which were filled with sympathy and despair, maybe even regret.

 We sat there staring at each-other. I looked down, swallowing a lump in my throat. Virgil sniffled, my head snapped up to see a steady stream of tears falling from his eyes. It broke my heart to see him like this. As if on instinct, I wrapped him up in my arms and began rubbing circles on his back. He buried his head in my chest, muffling his broken sobs.

"shhhh it's all right Virge, s'all gonna be okay."

I said in a hush voice. Virgil shook his head, pulling away just enough to look at me. He sniffled and sat studying my face for a while before sighing.

"I-I just... god I sound stupid. I want to apologize."

"Apologize? What for?"

He rested his head on my shoulder, avoiding my eyes.

"... for leaving."

I sighed and shook my head.

"You don't have to-"

"Let me finish." He said cutting me off.

"I'm sorry, not only for leaving without so much as a goodbye, but for treating you so harshly. I treated you like dirt even after you basically raised me, all because I didn't wan't to fall out of their favor. I fought against selfishness when in truth, I was the one being selfish-"

"No."

"Wh-What-"

"Don't apologize. Don't you dare ever apologize for wanting a better life. You saw an opportunity and you took it, you chose a better life with good friends who will support you."

"But in doing that I lost the only family I had. I took you for granted, and now.... now I'm losing you for real." 

Virgil's voice cracked. He looked down, wiping his eyes. I pressed my lips into a thin line, pulling him back into my embrace. We stayed like that for a few minutes. Aa soft snore emanated from the anxious side. I smiled and carefully laid us down, pulling the soft quilt over us. I missed this more than I realized. I thought while drifting into a peaceful slumber.

But what I didn't know, was that someone had been watching.