Remember me? |Levi's daughter|

Chapter 19

The monster I am

Y/n POV

No, no, no I didn't mean too, I'll fix it, I'll stay in control, don't worry....NO! STOP IT! I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry....KID WAKE UP! GODDAMNIT IT DIDNT WANT THIS! E-Erwin....no STOP!" I burst up from my sleep sweating and crying, I look around and I was in a bed with my hands and feet chained why....why am I still alive?! I think
"Y/n! Your okay!" I hear Armin yell happily, I stare at him no stay away I'll hurt you again I think, I turn my head away from him
"Y/n your awake!" I hear Eren yell next door to me stop treating me like I did nothing I hurt all of you, and.....and killed commander Erwin I think, I hear footsteps running down the stairs I see my dad, he quickly opens the door and comes and gives me a big hug

I look around, my heart start pumping faster than anything before, I couldn't breath, I desperately tried to get air in but fail, I start panicking more since I can't breath, my palms start sweating rapidly don't touch me please I think, he pulls away from the hug and looks at me
"Y/n what's wrong?!" He asks frantically
"Leave" i mutter
"What did you say?" He asks, my heart feels like it's going to burst out of my chest
"GET OUT!" I beg, he looks out me wide eyed and then stands up and leaves, my heart rate doesn't go down
"I-I can't br-breath" I whisper-shout
"What?" Dad asks
"W-wh-hy c-a-an I no-ot br-reat-th" I huff, I look at Armin and he comes rushing in, and sits right in front of me
"Follow my breathing ok" he says, I just nod

I start to copy his breathing and soon enough I was able to breath again
"What the hell was that?!" My dad exclaims
"I'm pretty sure y/n just had a anxiety attack" he says anxiety attack? I think
"Well you have trail again, to see if you will be.....killed or not" Armin says
"Um ok" I say I can't die though, this devil won't let me I think
"Where are we anyways?" I blandly ask
"Troust" my dad says my eyes widen
"How....how many casualties?" I mutter
"That doesn't matter" he replies obviously a lot I think
"Anyways we should get you to the trail room now, it should start soon" Armin says

They take me off the cuffs and I see guards all around me, their guns pointing right at me as I get out of my cell, cuffs get out on me and Eren, Mikasa, Armin, my dad and Hange follow behind me I won't survive this I think, I hear little mutters behind me, I hate not hearing them if they have anything to say about me they should just say it
"If your calling me a monster or a killer just say it outloud" i blandly reply

Erens POV

We were walking behind y/n I'm really worried if she'll make it threw this or not what if they try and kill her....no I'll protect her I think
"I'm nervous" Armin whispers beside me
"Why?" Mikasa whispers
"About y/n what if she gets handed over to the military police, they'll experiment on her or something" he whispers worried
"They won't get her I promise" I whisper
"If your calling me a monster or a killer just say it outloud" she says blandly
"N-no were not doing that!" I reply
"I wouldn't blame you I did hurt you all" she says
"You weren't yourself" I calmly say trying to cheer her up
"No I just wasn't in control, plus that won't bring back the commander will it" she blandly says looking down

Y/n POV

We make it to court room, it's the same as before but I have military police and scouts have me at gun point, there were about 50 of them these people know that, that will do jack shit it me I think, I crouch down and my hands get put behind a pole, soon the judge walks up
"Y/n Ackerman how do you plead?" He asks
"Guilty" i mutter
"Alright witnesses say that you, had wings, horns and claws is this true?" He asks
"Yes"
"Also you killed over 100 people in troust, why?" He asks, i stiffen at the number 100... I think how many were kids? I think
"I-I....my body and mind got taken over, but that's no excuse, still it was me and if I didn't give up and kept fighting to maintain control those people would've been spared" I mumble
"Who and how did this person take over your body?" He asks shit...I think I will be 100% honest though I think
"His name is Satan he lives inside me, and after I found out the truth of my mother I had a breakdown causing him to wake in me, it is the worse feeling. His cold demonic voice echoing in my head, the never ending darkness in my head only being able to see glimpses of him he said that "if he should his full true self my eyes would melt immediately at the sight of it" I quote, it felt like I had been gone for years or it was a bad dream" i blandly say, causing people to widen their eyes

I hadn't even realised that I had been crying I quickly wiped them away with my shoulder and looked back up at the judge
"We're is he now and are you in control" he says skepticle
"He is in this necklace, and I am in control" I say looking down
"NO SHE CAN'T BE TRUSTED" "I SAY KILL HER NOW!" " SHES KILLED TO MANY OF US!" I hear people screaming I honestly at this point didn't care what happened to me
"I agree sir.....I think I should die" I say staring right at him
"WHAT NO Y/N!"Eren screams
"Yeager you can stop pretending, after all I nearly killed you, your best friend, your sister c'mon I know you hate me" i blandly say
"Y/n no I care about you" he calmly says
"If you really do your a absolute idiot for caring about i monster like me" I reply
"GOD DAMNIT YOUR NOT A MONSTER!" He screams
"Really? Then what do you call the thing I am huh?" I ask he doesn't have anything to say
"Anyways-" I begin to speak before the doors slam open
"Her majesty is has graced you with her presents" a guard yells majesty? I think
"Hello y/n" I familiar voice says
"Historia?" I question
"Miss y/n will be freed on my accounts, I suggest that she goes under the control of the survey corpe and they will try and help y/n control this power she has" she speaks
"What no! Historia please let them kill me" I plead
"No your power can help us on our victory, also I'm not letting another comrade die" she replies you dumbass do you not fucking know how hard it is for me to stay in control!? I think

Soon they let me out of the cuffs and just as I walk out of the room along the survey corpe, a middle aged women comes up to me, and glares at me then slaps me, making people gasp and pull their swords out
"You monster.....you killed my daughter.....she was only 7 and you murdered her you cut her limbs off like she was a peice of nothing, SHE WAS MY WORLD! AND YOU KILLED HER!" She yells at me I just stare at her
"I'm truly sorry" I attempt to apologise
"No! No apology will get my baby girl back, you deserve to rot in hell" she sneers before running off, I turn around in shock but quickly make a picker face
"Y/n are you okay?, that lady doesn't know anything" Mikasa asks worried, I give her a fake smile
"Yup" I reply before walking off

I walk outside of the building and sit on the deck, I see people huddled over dead bodies, they look at me and start screaming at me, some threw rocks at me, some only screamed, others swore but what really hurt was a little boy about 10 ran up to me his cheeks red, eyes puffy he kicked my shin as hard as he could and looked up to me
"You killed my mother! I will find a way to kill you I'll avenge her, I DISPISE YOU!" He screams, people come and throw rocks but soon move to kicking me I just stand still I deserve worse I think
"Y/N! GET AWAY FROM HER!" I hear Eren yell, the people start running away, he comes up to me

My mouth was leaking blood, my nose was broken, they had kicked in my ribs breaking 3, my collar bone was in pieces
"I'll get those people!" He yells angrily
"No need they're angry, I don't blame them" i blandly say before sitting up
"Well at least try and control the power, I mean you a titan shifter, you can fly, and who knows what else you can do!" He says trying to be positive
"Not to be bland but I how am I supposed to control something the Gods couldn't even control?" I ask looking at him
"I'm more of a burden than anything, I'll get in the way" i mutter I pull my knees up to my chest he comes and sits next to me

We just sit next to each other for a little bit staring out to the ruined city
"You know I care about you, so I'm not going to leave you" he says
"I'd like to think that" I mumble
"Why think it, I'm not going to leave you!" He says
"Why should you care about me, why should we be happy and make friends and family they'll all leave you one way or another, whether it be death or abandonment they leave you will too, I don't want to get close to you, because than I know I'll get attached and I don't want it to hurt when you go" i blandly say, he looks at me shocked
"That's why you make the most of it, you make memories with people you love and care about!" He says
"Hmmm maybe..." I say, he comes towards me and pulls me into a hug, I soon wrap my arms around him why do you have to leave....

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1809
HI
I hope you liked this chapter
I'll be doing some more Eren x y/n moments
So I hope you like it
Bai