You Belong to Me

The Break In

Things with Luke are great.

Everything at work is great.

Life is going great.

See? Even to myself I can't sound convincing enough.

Luke is a really nice guy and I like him well enough but I don't see myself staying with him forever. I don't feel like we're both in the same place and want the same things.

Even the sex felt off. It was good but just wasn't enough. But he's so sweet and I really want to like him more.

After our first date, everything fizzled out quickly to the point where we would order take out at his place and watch movies. Not that I'm trying to sound high maintenance but when you date someone for only a month, I thought there should still be some spark this early in the relationship.

We were enjoying another date night at his apartment, which by the way was ten times better than my box I called home.

"What should we watch? Scary? Comedy? True crime?" Luke asked while dividing out the containers of Chinese food.

My mind was distant tonight. "Um, dealers choice babe." I said without really paying attention.

"Oh, I got it. There's this documentary that just came out! Something about new found evidence..."

He kept talking and I nodded along to pretend like I was listening.

The documentary was two parts and lasted almost three hours. Afterwards, I was hoping Luke would invite me to spend the night with him. It would be the first time we actually spent all night and not have to just leave immediately after sex.

Luke stretched his arms out and yawned, "well, it's getting kinda late. Want me to call you a cab?" He asked while checking the watch he wore.

"Oh, that's okay." I tried to keep my patience. "Well, actually, I was hoping maybe I could stay here tonight? You know, spend more time with you?" I asked hopeful he'd say yes.

"Oh, oh, umm I'm sorry but I actually have a really busy day tomorrow and have to be up early. I'm sorry." He avoided my gaze.

Okayyyy. Talk about weird.

"Ah okay then. I guess I'll just... go then." I said disheartened. Luke jumped up from the couch to walk me out, a little too enthusiastically.

"Hey, I'll text you again sometime this week?" He asked.

"Yeah, sure." I tried to keep my disappointment inside.

I think I can understand now why I don't see myself with him.

He leaned in to kiss me but instead of my lips, I turned my head to offer a cheek. Already upset with how this night went.

I skipped out on taking the cab, even though I could easily afford it. I had taken the check Roy gave me and deposited it into my account to keep it safe and hopefully keep it in savings. The lady at the bank could not believe her eyes when I handed it to her. I couldn't blame her, I still couldn't fully believe it myself but the paper checked out and I looked at my savings the next morning to see it all there. I took a huge sigh of relief. I was in the green for the first time in my life and it felt good to have that sense of security.

I plan to keep every cent and add to it so that maybe one day soon I could move from the city to a nice house, even if I ended up alone. Which at the rate things were going with Luke, that seemed to be closer to reality than I care to admit.

About thirty minutes later I turned the corner to the front of my apartment building and stopped. Squad cars and what seemed like a dozen uniformed officers were huddled around outside. An ambulance and fire truck surrounded by everything. Bright flashing lights lit up every nook and cranny of the street. I walked hesitantly towards the commotion.