The competition (explicit marvel fiction)

The pain

You join the team for breakfast, you're not hungry so just grab a quick coffee.
"I fancy a run today, anyone want to join me?"
"I will" you look over to Steve
"Ok, but at a normal persons pace" "deal?"
"Im not making any promises" you roll your eyes and smile.
"Anyone seen the birthday boy?" Tony asks.
Some of the team start laughing.
"He's probably out skipping or something, he was in a great mood this morning, was even humming to himself, was odd. must of really enjoyed his birthday" Sam replies
"Oh here he is" "see for yourself"
Peter comes in, huge grin on his face "good morning everyone, it is a good morning isn't it?"
You can't stay, you're not sure what he will say if you do.
"Steve, i will meet you outside" you head off with your coffee
"Hey" Nat shouts you
"By any chance you have something to do with Peters mood this morning? He seemed to leave very soon after you last night"
you laugh
"He's not very subtle is he"
"Far from it" "he's like the Cheshire cat"
"So, how was it?"
"Actually, amazing, he's a true gentleman, very impressed" Nat looks shocked, "wow Parker can pull out the stops then"
"He sure can"
"What are you two laughing about?"Steve approaches
"Oh nothing"
"Not me i hope"
"No not you, well not this time anyway"
"Come on lets go, i think it might rain soon"
"Have fun" Nat walks back to the team.
***
You're half way through your run and the heavens open.
You continue running but Steve pulls you under shelter
"I could of carried on"
"Are you sure?" He points behind you
The rain is torrential
"Point proven"
You both sit on the floor, up against the wall staring at the rain
"So Agent Hunter, how are you getting on?"
You sit and think
"Im good, nothing much has changed yet, i get so torn, some days i just want it all to be over and done with and go through the unknown and others i cant bare to face the thought"
"I can't begin to understand, but if you ever need someone to talk to, I'm a good listener"
"I appreciate that"
"So, Tony hasn't told me much lately about Hydra, i don't think he wants me to get distracted, is there anything new?"
"Unfortunately not, we've lost all contact, we don't know where they've gone or when they're planning the attack, if they still are"
"I wish i could help, maybe i could draw them out?"
"What, you want to act as sacrifice?" "No chance, no wonder Tony doesn't talk about it, you really think anyone would allow you to do that"
"But you're just sitting around waiting? Surely you want to get it started, end them once and for all?"
"Of course, but we need to come up with a plan"
You look at him
"A better plan" he says
You roll your eyes "well you know where i am if you get desperate, its not like I'm doing much"
He rests his hand on your leg
"I can tell you hate sitting back watching, but right now its for the best, you need to..."
"Yes control my powers, learn emotions..."
"Yes, but also learn about yourself, develop an understanding of who you are, then you can properly fight" "if you go out there now, you could easily be blindsided, you could become uncontrollable, we aren't just protecting you Agent Hunter, we have to protect all of them" he nods to the city
Its the first time you've really thought about it,
Of course they can't send you out there.
"You're right" "i need to stop thinking for myself, hard when you don't know anything other than that"
"Nothing wrong with being selfish Miss Hunter, but to be an Avenger, and fight for the Avengers, you have to protect everyone"
"I think you guys will throw me out before i get to fight, this whole process is slow, give my room to someone who deserves it"
"And you don't think you do?" "Have you not seen the way everyone is when you walk into a room, the way people try and fight for your attention?"
"Part of the problem Captain, I'm oblivious"
"Well the day you do see it Miss Hunter, you will see how much you deserve it, you are very much part of this team as the rest of us"
Tears fall down your face, this time you sense it, its like your chest is crushing you.
Steve notices "Hunter are you ok?"
You shake your head holding your chest. Tears streaming down your face
"Hunter?" You look at him panicked
"Don't worry, it will be ok"
He picks you up in his arms and runs back to the tower. He gets through the lab doors and calls for Tony.
Your withering in pain, holding your chest. He places you down on the table, holding your hand
"What is going on Tony"
"What happened?"
"We were just talking, then this"
"Talking about what?"
"Erm about her being part of the team, deserving to be here, i don't know i cant remember, can you stop it?"
"No"
"What do you mean no? Look at her Tony" Steve shouts at him
"I know i can see for myself!" "If i could stop it i would but i can't" "this is part of it, the part she was dreading, the pain, the remembering"
"TONY!" you scream
His heart stops for a second
"TONY PLEASE"
The pain gets stronger, your tears heavier
"I can't Tony i can't" he places your head in his hands
"Yes you can! You have to!"
Tears roll down your face
"Tony please do something please, it hurts"
He swallows hard and puts his forehead on yours "i can't, I'm sorry i cant"
You scream in pain, Tony on one side and Steve on the other, trying to reassure you, the pain replicated on their faces.
Your chest feels like its going to cave in, you struggle to catch your breath. Faces flash in your mind, you don't recognise them, Tony and Steves voices get quieter, you become dizzy, thats the last thing you remember.