The Curse of Your Past // Charlie Gillespie

Chapter 21

When I wake up I feel like I've been hit by a truck. My eyes are still swollen from all the tears. I remember last night and I can feel my chest tighten. I fumble for my phone. I have to text Valerie and ask if we can meet at the club later. 

I have a couple of unread messages. One's from Jenny, just a normal reply to our texts from yesterday before everything happened. I didn't tell her that I talked to Max... she'll know soon enough. I know she would try to stop me. They just don't know him the way I do. They don't know how insane he is, what he can do, what he can make people believe. 

I also have an unread text from Charlie. My heart skips a beat and my pulse starts to raise as I click on it. There's breakfast for you on the counter... I'll be gone until about 8pm. He made me breakfast? After everything? I can't even consider eating anything right now. Just the thought of it makes me feel sick. I force myself to leave bed and get dressed.

I feel like an intruder walking around Charlie's apartment. I can't believe I'll have to leave in a little more than two days. On the counter I find a bowl of granola and some yogurt with blueberries and strawberries. I didn't even know we had them anymore. They are my favorites. All the little things Charlie remembers...

"Thanks for meeting me." Valerie gives me a hug and I return the hug, maybe a little tighter than I should have but I really just needed a hug right now. "Your text sounded urgent." I nod and gesture for her to sit down on the couch. I sit down next to her. "I was wondering if... I don't know... maybe you want the club back? Or maybe you know someone who would want it?" Her eyes widen in disbelief. 

"Why? You loved it, don't you anymore?" I shake my head slightly. "No, it's amazing! I love it but... I'm just not cut out for this." I tell her the same lie I told Charlie. Maybe one day I'll actually believe it too if I just tell it often enough. "Victoria! People love what you did to the place!" 

Hearing that stings in my chest. I was always so worried people wouldn't like the changes I made and wouldn't be happy with what the club is now. Hearing they do should make me happy, make me proud and somewhere deep down it does but knowing it's over even though I'm good at it... it hurts. "I'm glad but... it's just too much. I'll be moving back to Germany in two days." Better to rip the bandage of right away. 

Saying that I'll move back to Germany makes me feel sick and I wish I wouldn't have forced myself to eat the breakfast Charlie made me. I just couldn't let it go to waste after he made sure to include all my favorites. "I don't understand." I force a smile on my face. "Neither did I at first but... it's just where I have to be." At least that part is not a complete lie. I have to be in Germany because it's the only way to keep Charlie save.

"What about Charlie?" I really don't wanna talk about Charlie right now. I can't. Swallowing real hard I say "We broke up." I don't look at Valerie. I have to focus all my energy on not crying infront of her. "Victoria! I'm so sorry! What happened?" I shrug my shoulders helplessly. "As I said... I'm not cut out to be the person I have to be to stay." 

I know she doesn't agree with me but instead of trying to change my mind or throwing accusations at me or anything else she just pulls me into a hug. This small gesture makes me burst into tears again. I tried so hard to suppress them but I can't anymore. Valerie gently strokes my back. "It's all going to be ok." It has to be. I'll be fine as long as I know Charlie is save.

"Are you sure about this?" I take a deep breath and say "Yes." This is the only choice I have. "Then we'll figure out what to do with the club." I smile at her thankfully. "Thank you." She nods slightly. "Will you be at tomorrows Open-Mic-Night?" I nod shyly. "Yeah... If you're ok with it." Her eyes widen once again. "Of course I am! This is still your club!" I'm gonna miss her. Valerie has always been so supportive. Without any hesitation she had believe in me from the beginning. She's grown so close to me in those few short weeks it feels like I've known her my entire life.

I don't wanna go back to the apartment yet so I walk down to the beach. I sit down and watch the waves, playing with my bracelet, completely lost in my thoughts. The ringing of my phone rips me out and back to the present. It's Jenny. I take a few steady breaths and try to place a smile on my face as I pick up. "Hey J!" 

I can already tell something is up by the way she looks at me. "V..." How does she know? "How was your date with Josh?" It's a miserable try to distract her but I at least have to try. "V... don't try to stall." I sigh in defeat. "What is it then?" I need to know what she knows so I can measure what I have to tell her. I will eventually tell her everything when I'm back but right now... 

"Why in the hell did you break up with Charlie?" I was not expecting that. "How do you know?" - "He texted me earlier." Oh... I certainly wasn't expecting that either. I open my mouth to say something. "Don't dare lie to me."