The Curse of Your Past // Charlie Gillespie

Chapter 26

I couldn't fall asleep again because knowing today is the day I have to leave resulted in Max' face being all I can see when I close my eyes. So instead of sleeping I listened to Charlie's heartbeat, so calm and steady and caught myself forgetting that soon everything will be over. It's already bright out by now so I guess it's about time for me to leave. 

I have to swing by the club to drop off the keys and papers and apologize to Valerie for leaving without saying a word last night. I need to be at the airport at noon because it is a stupid international flight so I get to spend three lovely hours at the airport with Max and Evelyn, not to mention the hours we spend on a plane. 

As carefully as I can I maneuver myself out of Charlie's arms. This time I'm successful, or maybe he knows that he has to let me go. I walk out of his room as quietly as I possibly can, leaving the door open a crack. I walk into my room and take the letter from underneath my pillow. After putting on some leggings and Charlie's shirt I pull my hair into a bun. I take the letter and tiptoe back to Charlie's room. 

He's still asleep. He looks so peaceful. I stay for a moment longer than I should, trying to burn the memory into my brain. I can feel tears forming in my eyes so I turn around and walk back into the living area. I close the door as quietly as I can and let out a breath. I just stand there for a few moments, unable to bring myself to grab my bags and leave.

The moment I shut the front door I know it's officially over. Suddenly my chest feels so tight, like there isn't enough room for me to breath anymore. Close to tears I walk down to the street corner where my Uber is waiting. I can't walk down to the club right now, not with my suitcase anyways.

"Victoria!" Valerie is already at the club, getting rid of last nights leftovers. She stops what she's doing and comes walking over towards me, pulling me into her arms. "I can't believe you're leaving today." I shake my head, the first tears already pushing themselves up to my eyes. "Neither can I." We sit down on the couch in the corner and I look around the club... my club. 

This is all I've ever dreamed of and now it's gone... taken away from me. This is so unfair. Valerie seems to sense my emotions, or maybe she just sees the tears sparkling in my eyes. "Victoria... if there is ever anything you need... or if you're ever back in LA... you call me, ok?" I love her so much. I look up at her, swallowing hard and nod. "Thank you Valerie... for everything... I'm sorry I left so quickly last night but..." 

My voice breaks at the memory of Charlie's hands reaching for my hands, his lips brushing mine... I miss him so much already. I have no idea how I'm meant to survive this. Valerie softly rubs my arm. "It's ok... this can't be an easy choice." I know I told her this isn't who I'm meant to be but she knows me better than to believe the lie I told her. My phone rings. It's the alarm I set to not be at the airport late.

 "I gotta go..." Together we walk outside the club and to my Uber. Valerie gives me a big hug and whispers into my ear "It'll all be ok." I wish she would be right but sadly this won't be ok. I sit down in the back of the Uber. Looking out of the window I wonder if Charlie read my letter by now...

Dear Charlie,

I'm truly sorry about everything. I'm sorry I lied to you but it was my only option. I'm so sorry I hurt you but this is the only way to keep you save. Save from him and... save from me. No matter where I'll go... this will never be over... he made a promise to ruin my life and he'll find a way to keep it no matter what. I can handle it. I'll be ok as long as I know you are.

You were right, you deserve to know the truth... Max said if I don't break up with you, sell my club and go back to living with him he'll make sure you go to prison for kidnapping me. I know how insane this sounds but it's Max... he can make this happen. And even if he wouldn't get through with it? The media that would attract... it could ruin you! I can't allow that to happen to you... not because of my stupidity. I made it so easy for him... Changing my number, turning all my socials private... and he has my own mother on his side... there's no winning against him.

I'm so so sorry I didn't tell you but I know you would have stopped me. I know you would have said we can do this but this time we can't.

You've always been there for me so let me be there for you this time. Let me do this...

You showed me what love means... without you I would have never known that feeling. I love you Charlie, more than words can possible express and that's why I have to know you're save from him.

I hope one day you can understand my choice and forgive me... even though I would understand if you can't. I'm sorry about the things I said, I truly am but I thought it would be easier for you to hate me. Dating you was the greatest experience I've had in my entire life and I wish I could do it until the day I die.

I love you so much,

Victoria