cast l.h

week seven part two

A/N OKAY SO THIS CHAPTER IS REALLY SAD AND IT DEALS WITH A LOT OF THINGS THAT ARE REALISTIC AND SAD SO HOPE YOU ENJOY IT BUT ALSO REALIZE MANY PEOPLE STRUGGLE WITH THE PROBLEMS IZZY DOES AND IT IS OKAY TO GET HELP! Xoxo

For the first time in weeks rain beats down from the sky. For a Thursday night I'm strangely relaxed and not freaking out about my classes. I sway back and forth from the large back porch swing and listen to the droplets fall overhead.

It's 8pm and a bit chilly. An old quilt is wrapped around my body while I flip through my sociology textbook.

Just as I get interested in the assignment my phone rings, at first I consider letting it go to voicemail but then feel a sudden compulsion to pick it up and see who it is. My eyes scan the out of state number displayed across the screen.

Almost instantly I get sick to my stomach when my brain recognizes the number I'd seen a thousand times... it is Calum.

ring... Why is he calling me?

ring... Did something happen?

ring... I haven't spoken to him in a year, since the day of my trial. I expected him to write me while I was in, or be there when I got out. He was my best friend for gods sake and it felt like I was dead to him.

ring... My index finger quickly slides the button to the right and I put the phone up to my ear. I have no words that come out at first, the line is silent until I hear a familiar clear of the throat.

¨Z, is this you?¨ I shutter at the sound of my life long friend's voice and the way he called me 'Z' like he used to. He sounds uncomfortable with pain written in undertones of his voice.

¨Yeah Cal it's me,¨ I stutter.

¨Hi,¨ he says.

¨Hi.¨

¨I got your number from your mom,¨ Calum speaks softly.

¨Oh, why?¨

¨Because I came to see you and you weren't there.¨

At this moment, I just want to scream at him, tell him how I cried for months because he forgot about me, tell him how alone I feel here sometimes without him. But I can't seem to do it.

¨Yeah, they didn't want me to live with them.¨

¨Why, it is your home?¨

¨You know why Calum, I'm nothing to them.¨

¨Don't say that, it's not all your fault.¨

¨It's not all your fault.¨ Calum whispered in my ear outside our small town's courthouse.

An umbrella lay over our heads where he holds it as I keep my head on his shoulder. My clothes are damp and uncomfortable.

¨I can't go in there,¨ I cry.

¨Z you don't have a choice,¨ he stutters.

¨Can't we just run away?¨ I ask knowing the answer is no.

¨I wish... I really do,¨ he says. I pick up my head and look at my tall friend in his brown eyes. He stares right back. We know what each is thinking. His eyes fill with tears which I can tell he's trying to hold back.

I haven't seen him cry since he was 12 and he tore his ACL in a soccer tournament, but here he was in front of me about to cry. I begin to sob; me always being the weaker one. He pulls me back into a big embrace as I hear my attorney stick her head out of the court doors calling for me.