cast l.h

week eleven

A/N

STOP RIGHT HERE PLEASE! LET ME KNOW WHAT YOU THOUGHT IN THE COMMENTS ABOUT THE BIG REVEAL ABOUT WHY SHE WAS IN PRISON. ANY GUESSES? ok thanks. heres a long chapter... oh and to the people who liked the title reference last chapter, props ily. xoxo

This past week, every morning I've woken with the same pit in my stomach. The leaves on the trees are completely bare now and their branches look lonely and cold. School has become extremely uncompelling. I wake up, go to classes, read, and fall asleep. I'm not hungry much, and if I am the only hunger is the desire to smoke a cigarette, something I haven't done in forever. Maybe I'm depressed again.

Luya keeps reaching out but I don't know what to say. She will either judge me or pity me; I don't know which is worse. Seeing Shyla in such bad condition has really taken it's toll on Ashton, Luke, and I. We hardly talk.

Shyla isn't doing too well. She's been preparing for the procedure, but at one of her appointments she had another small stroke. It took her two days to even be able to comprehend what was going on. She's still at the hospital.

Although Luke refuses to even look at me, I can tell how hard it is for him to see Shyla going through this, especially after what happened with his mom... I tried once after the night in the woods to talk to him but he has built a wall of hostility and pride. I can't blame him for that.

Ashton tries really hard to take care of us. I don't think he realizes we're adults. Him being a couple years older has gone to his head and made him think he has to be our father. In his defense, he's been a better father to me in a week than my Father had been in 16 years.

I cleaned my room yesterday, Ashton made me. I'll admit it, I feel a little better with it clean.

I hear rustling on the floor beneath me. I look at the clock. 8:30 pm. It's Wednesday.

I stare out the windows from my bed and stare at the ice crystals forming on the perimeter of my window. It looks just like a Hallmark commercial window. I wonder what Calum is doing. I haven't responded to his emails recently. I don't want to depress him.

I roll to the other side of my bed to the nightstand with my phone on it. It is cold to the touch, and I realize I haven't touched it in days. The only messages are from Ashton, telling me food is ready, and Luya asking me where I've been.

Neither are marked as read.

My contacts list is embarrassingly empty so it isn't hard to find Cal's name. Before I hit call, I do that thing I do. Where I beat myself up and go back and forth between decisions, but I end up calling him. It rings a few times and just as I am about to hang up I hear his voice.

¨Hello?¨ his voice cracks like I had just woken him up.

¨Cal, it's me?¨ the line is silent for a seconds so I add, ¨Izzy, Z, Isabella Cooper, your life long friend.¨

¨Oh,¨ he sounds tired still, but more excited ¨whats up? Is everything okay?¨ He whispers.

I want to tell him everything, but I don't. ¨Yeah, I just miss you. Why are you whispering? It's only 8:30.¨

¨No reason,¨ I can tell he's lying but I don't push him, he hates that.

¨Okay... how are you?¨

¨I'm alright, I miss you too. I think my family wants me to come visit them in the city home for Thanksgiving. They've been there for a while.¨

¨That's an improvement!¨

We continue to catch up which makes me feel a little better by the time he has to go. I decide to respond to Luya, I've been a bad friend. ¨Hey! Sorry I've been a-wall! A lot of school work and family stuff. I promise we'll catch up soon. Miss you.¨ I send and then put the phone back down.