Hiding Behind the Lenses (Arte del Amor #3)

Chapter 16

"I guess this would be the last roadtrip we'd have for quite some time." Kuya Gavin said, saying what I did not want to hear.

This is also their last attempt at cheering me up.

I've been down for the last few months... and I'm leaving for Manila tomorrow. Hindi ko na nakuhang makausap si Nikolai ulit. Hindi na rin kasi siya pumapasok.

I tried to ask Anika but she would dodge me every time.

Hindi pa maayos ang buhay ko rito pero heto, magsisimula na agad ako ng bago sa malayo.

It's not like I could defy my mother... the first time I thought of doing it, it was over before I could even go against her.

For tonight, I'll throw everything outside the window. I'm with my brothers and that's enough for me right in this very moment.

Starting tomorrow, I'd have to live without waking up to their annoying faces. I still haven't figured out how to get used to that.

Everything's changing and I'm not ready for it... but it hurts to go against the current.

It's better to just go with it and see where it takes me. Habang lang hindi ko pa kayang lumaban sa rumaragasang agos.

Life in Manila is hard. It's nothing compared to the life that I lived back in Pampanga. Parang mas mahirap para sa akin. Mas nakakapagod. Sobrang daming pagkakataon na ginusto kong umuwi.

Sobrang daming luha ang ibinuhos ko sa bawat gabi na hinihiling kong maging bata na lang ulit.

And tonight is one of those nights. I've been lying down in bed since I got home this afternoon. I didn't even bother to open the lights in my room. Kung hindi ako sa dingding nakatulala ay tinatanaw ko ang nagtatayugang mga building sa tabi ng condo.

Wala akong ganang gumawa ng kahit ano.

Even my phone is turned off because my manager, Juli, is probably blowing it off with reminders every passing minute.

It's annoying...

Alam naman nila na susundin ko ang lahat ng pinapagawa nila sa akin, eh. Bakit hindi nila ako pagbigyan minsan?

Isinakripisyo ko na ang buong pagkabata ko para sa industriya na 'to, pero kahit minuto ng pahinga ay hindi ko na maibigay sa sarili ko.

I groaned before turning to the other side of the bed to  finally turn my phone on. Hindi pa noon nare-recognize ang fingerprint ko ay bumungad na kaagad ang tawag  ni Khali sa akin.

"What?" salubong ko pagkasagot ko noon.

"Ang maldita mo naman." sabi ng kaibigan ko. Tumawa siya kaya nahawaan naman ako agad at nakitawa na rin. "Bawal ka bang kumustahin, ha? Bawal, Gemini?"

Khali used to be so shy and timid. She's still on that side of the social spectrum but at least she's slowly opening up to others now. Mas vocal na rin siya ngayon.

Being the constant support system that I have for the past four years, I am thankful to have her.

The transition from Pampanga to Manila has been hard but she helped make it a little better. She reminds me of home.

"Kailan ka ba babalik dito? It's been so long since your last vacation."

I shrugged, knowing that my schedule is full-packed for the rest of this year.

"Soon."

She sighed after hearing that word again from me for the nth time. Ngumiti ako para kahit papaano ay gumaan ang loob ng kaibigan ko.