Magcon (Tumblr) Imagines

Nate Maloley Part 2

Nate's POV
Have fun. Have fun. Those two simple words have been echoing in my mind for the past three days. I can't shake them from my thoughts and they're paralyzing me. I haven't said a word since I left that night. I didn't go to the party but I couldn't stay home either. I couldn't bear the thought of looking at her. I broke her and now I'm too scared to face the consequences.

When I left the house that night I just remember walking. Walking and walking and walking with no clue on where I was going. My head was void of all thought. The only image my mind could conjure up was the hard-set frown on Y/N's face. I had managed to find a small motel amidst my wandering. That is where I had been residing. The image of Y/N stayed in my mind as I laid awake until the first peak of sunlight appeared through the windows. Only then could I allow myself such comfort as sleep. However, I did not receive the peace I expected.

I walked up the steps of our house with flowers and chocolates, ready to apologize to Y/N for my actions. When I open the door I have a huge grin on my face until I realize that the house is completely empty. No furniture, no wallpaper, and most importantly: No Y/N. her voice would echo throughout the halls of the abandoned house. 'This is your fault Nate. I warned you." And then I woke up.

For two nights and days this repeated until I had made up my mind to not go to sleep again. I couldn't bear hearing her emotionless voice reminding me of my mistakes. On the third day I had finally turned my phone back on. 60 missed calls. 45 text messages. 15 voicemails. Nothing from Y/N. I had turned my phone off when I first arrived at the motel, to upset to answer anyones calls. I started by checking my missed calls. All from Sammy or the Jacks asking where I was, same with the text messages. It was another half hour before I mustered up enough strength to call anyone back. I dialed Sammy's number.

"Nate?! Nate are you okay?! You had us all worried sick! You've been M.I.A for three days! What the fuck is wrong with you?!" Although he was frantically yelling into the speaker I could hear the sigh of relief when I started talking.

"I had to get away for a little, man. I've made some bad choices and I don't know how to deal with them." My voice was hoarse and gravelly from not using it in so long.

"What are you talking about man? Are you alright? Did something happen?" I couldn't help but let out an airy chuckle at that question. Did something happen?

"Yeah man, something happened. I happened. I think I've lost Y/N. I've made such bad decisions and I ignored and neglected her. She finally told me how big of a screw up I was and now I don't know what to do. Sammy, she's the only thing I've ever done right and I've fucked that up."

"Well then you have to do everything you can to fight for her or..." he trailed off.

"Or what Sam?"

"Or you've got to let her go." I stayed silent. My mind had relapsed into blankness again and no intelligent thoughts were coming to my head. "Listen man, whatever you do it can't be just for your benefit. You have a chance to make this right for her. Do what you think is the right thing, but it can't be for selfish reasons. It's got to be the best thing for her."

I hung up after that. I wasn't angry at Sam, but that didn't make what he said hurt any less. I knew he was right, that whatever I did had to be in her best interest but I'm scared that that might mean letting her go. And I wasn't ready to do that. I would never be ready to do that. So that left only one option. Fight for her. Try to show her, and myself, that I am capable of change.

Two hours after my phone call with Sam and I'm showered, shaved, freshly dressed, ready to get my girl back. I had picked up a dozen roses and a box of chocolates and I'm currently standing on the steps of our house. Taking a deep breath, I put my fist against the door and knock. No answer. I knock twice more and finally resign myself to fetching the key from under the mat and going to wait inside. And I'm met with the scene from my dreams.

It's not quite the same, however. The furniture is still there along with the wallpaper that she picked out when we first moved in. And all of our pictures still hung on the walls. However, it was definitely different. The air seemed lonelier and there was an envelope on the coffee table that was placed on top of a picture of me and Y/N on our one year anniversary. My breathing was heavy and I could feel tears welling in my eyes as I predicted what the notes would say. As I bent down I noticed my name written in her beautiful handwriting on the back of the envelope.

Nate,

Please do not take this note as a sign that I don't love you anymore. That is the furthest thing from the truth. I am writing this because I love you more than I have ever loved anything. With that being said: you have changed. You are no longer the sweet, caring man that I fell in love with five years ago. You need help. You need to find yourself again. You need to fix yourself before you can even think of fixing this relationship. This goes for me as well. I am no longer the same person either. And this love, this relationship is certainly not the same. I am going home for a little while. I'm hoping that visiting the place where I grew up will help me figure everything out. I suggest you do the same. I've left our pictures on the wall in hopes of reminding you what our love felt like. All of the happiness and hope it contained. And hopefully one day, when we've both had time to rebuild ourselves and I learn how to make myself whole again, maybe then we will be able to work on rebuilding this relationship and find happiness in each other. But until then, my love, I wish you the best and most fulfilling life.

Yours Truly,

Y/N Y/L/N
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Should I do more parts to this ????? I think I should !!!