Never Love Again

1

NEVER LOVE AGAIN CHAPTER 1

Have you ever felt so hopeless that you can't even see the light at the end of the tunnel? Have you ever asked your existence because of a painful truth? Because I did. I was so hopeless that I can no longer hope for another day. I even questioned Him for giving me this life if He'll just take it back, too soon.

She only have a limited time.

She only have a limited time.

She only have a limited time.

She only have a limited time.

Six words. It's just six words but it made my world stop and made my dreams crumble into tiny million pieces.

Until now, I still can't believe that of all people it has to be me. Marami namang masasamang tao diyan bakit ako pa? Ang dami ko pang pangarap eh, halos kakasimula ko palang bouin ang mga pangarap ko pero anim na letra at isang letseng sakit ang hahadlang sa mga pangarap na yun.

Natigil ako sa pag-iisip nang bigla na lang may kumatok sa pintuan ng kwarto ko. How many times do I have to tell them that I don't want to talk to anyone here anymore? Mahirap bang intindihin iyon?

Kahit nga sila Aerith at Ella ay hindi ko chinachat kahit na andami na nila mga messages sa akin. Nangangamusta sila at talagang nag-aalala, ayokong idamay sila sa sitwasyon ko.

"Ren? I brought you some foods."

Boses ni Kuya Rhys ang narinig ko mula sa likod ng pinto. They're very persistent of getting me out of my room, and to talk to them again. Para saan pa ba? Someday, I will never get to talk to them anymore.

Hindi ako sumagot kay Kuya, I just stared at my door, thinking nothing. Sa totoo lang miss na miss ko na sila. Hindi rin naman madali para sa akin 'to eh. Ayoko lang na umiyak sila, na nakikita akong nahihirapan.

"Alam mo ba? Last week si Kuya Raven, nabasted." He chuckled. I smiled.

"He really like that girl, nag-effort talaga siyang bumili ng mga bulaklak, chocolates and those cheesy plans just to have her. Kaso hindi umobra ang charm ni Kuya sa kaniya eh. Nabasted. Kaya ayun, ka-bonding yung alak. Napagalitan tuloy nila Mama. Tripple Kill! Don't tell him that I told you about this ha? Ayaw niya kasing malaman ninyo na nabasted ang isang Raven." Tumawa na talaga siya. I didn't know na may nililigawan si Kuya last week. Hindi naman niya na kuwento sa akin, he used to tell me his whereabouts.

Wala si Kuya Raven ngayon dahil busy siya sa college, malayo ang university niya mula rito kaya naman pinilit siya nila Papa na tumira sa condo unit na malapit sa school. He doesn't want to leave, nang malaman niya ang sakit ko ay mas lalo lang niyang pinagpilitan na manatili rito. Pero si Papa pa din ang nasunod, sinugurado naman ni Papa na ayos lang ako.

Kahit naman malayo siya ay palagi naman niya akong kinukumusta kay Mama pero hindi ko siya kinakausap. Umuuwi naman siya minsan pero tulog ako parati at hindi kami mapang-abot, even so he's still the same loving and caring Kuya Raven I knew. He never failed to be an amazing Kuya to me, ganun din si Kuya Rhys. They are the best Kuya's in the whole world. I couldn't wish for more.

"Don't worry, when everything's gonna be fine. We'll bond like the old times. We miss you so much, princess. Kuya missed you so much."

Tumulo ang luha ko dahil sa sinabi niya. They missed me. I missed them too, sobra. Pero ito lang yung alam kong paraan to keep them away from me. Ayokong iwan sila, ayoko pa. Ayoko silang makitang nasasaktan. Pero tadhana na yung nag desisyon.

Hindi pa din ako nagsalita. Pinipigilan kong marinig niya ang mga hikbi ko dahil alam kong mas lalo lang nilang ipagpipilitan na buksan ko ang pinto.