LIGHT FROM THE DESERT✓

||CHAPTER 4||

||ZAWADI||

I hate hawk eyes. They pry on their prey until the hawk gets its claws on it. Every time I make a move, I feel his eyes watching me. Studying my movements, my poise and expressions, keenly. With every minute that passes, I fight the urge to stare back at him. I know I can glare, but not for long as I would hope for. I don't have enough courage to accomplish that. Maybe just for a second or a few. That should be enough time to figure out what he's trying to see in me. Assuming that there is anything to see.

His constant prying nags me. It bothers me more than I care to admit. It makes me feel so uncomfortable. Men have stared at me while doing my job, but none of their glares felt powerful like his. It grips. Holding you down and keeping you from escaping. It also keeps you aware. Conscious of his presence. I dread that feeling, knowing that there is someone keeping track of me. Having my father on my back is enough to add another man. More so one who seems to have an agenda.

Just thinking of the possibility of him pursuing me like my father makes me feel fear crawling under my skin. Paralyzing fear. If he keeps watching me at that rate, I'll end up thinking him a predator calculating his moves to see how he'll get to pounce on his prey. It wouldn't be a surprise if that is the case. After all, we are in a club where all these sorts of things happen. Men are always on the hunt for ladies to complete their night. Though I pray and hope with the deepest part of my heart that he isn't a predator in hunting.

For a change of thoughts, I think of the best thing I can do to save myself from his uncomfortable glares. Ignore them and him entirely. It will not be easy but I'll try my best. Besides, it will only be for about an hour till my shift is over. After that, I will be free. I'll not have to worry about his constant glares. The possibility of him pursuing me too. I hope to never see him ever again. Such a dead wish. He is with Jason and Kes. Most likely, he is a friend of theirs and I should be expecting him occasionally if not frequently. Goodness, gracious. I hope I'm not going to be in more trouble with men. I'm tired. I've had enough.

A daring thought crossed my mind earlier. It would take me so much courage to accomplish it. It was to ask Kes about him. Who he is and why he keeps staring at me. Then I thought it better after holding an intra-personal meeting. It would be best if I just let it slide. After all, it is not my business to go asking about her male friends. She wouldn't even like it if I told her about it. She would approach the man and confront him. Which consequently would cause unnecessary bother. What's more, the man hasn't done anything major to prompt me into asking Kes about him. I'll just forget about him. Thinking about him is draining my mind already. It is making me feel tormented.

In truth though, every man drains my mind. I can't handle being near them for long. Well, except Jason. I've known him for a while and he looks like a good if not a great man. Otherwise, Kes wouldn't dare date him. I feel okay and comfortable around him. He doesn't make my skin feel like it's crawling with paranoia and fear. He's probably one of those rare species. Good for Kes. I only pray that they will last forever. That too, she never gets to experience the ugly side men can harbor. It would shatter her more than it has done me. I'm already used to it and she is not. To her, it would be a whole new thing. Torturing and traumatizing.

I'm walking toward the counter to get an order for a couple of young friends celebrating their graduation. I gathered that much from their chatter. Their conversation makes me think of my sister, Salima. I know she would love to study, graduate and chase her dreams. If only my father was father enough, he would consider taking her to college or university after she is done with high school. I have no idea what he plans to do with her. All I'm sure of is that his plans are not pretty as one would want them to be.