LIGHT FROM THE DESERT✓

||CHAPTER 18||

||ZAWADI||

"Mamaa," I call as tears soak my eyes.

She's standing by the door of our house. At long last, I'm back to this nostalgic place. Every memory that I left behind comes flocking its way into my head. Most of them dreadful but those consisting of the love mom and Salima gave me flutter their wings on the surface to lessen the pain the dreadful ones inflict.

The ride was long and boring. The two officers would keep chatting with themselves while I was sitting in the back seat doing nothing but dozing off or scrolling through social media. Kim and Kes were both busy catching up at work and I didn't want to bother them. A time or two, when I was awake, the officers would ask me questions. Particularly about my father. Even the most bizarre question, if at all he has ever been diagnosed with a mental illness. I told them he hasn't. You'd be a fool to think that he is suffering from a mental illness. He's very much okay. I tried to answer most of them to their satisfaction even though I liked keeping it simple.

When we arrived in town, the officers took lodging at their designated bookings. They were more than willing to take me home but I preferred walking not to catch the attention of the neighbours and prying eyes. My father too in case they took me to our gate and he happened to be home. It's as if they were forgetting about being a little discrete. I took a tuk-tuk from their lodging and it dropped me off outside the mosque gate. From there, I walked my way through the dusty alley. The few walking towards their courses would stare at me but none would recognise me. I went for a burqa to stay under the radar. They don't need to know that I am back. Probably most of them thought that I was new to the place.

At the gate, I was surprised to see Sal rushing towards me looking all excited and emotional. It looked like she had been waiting for me the whole day. I was so excited to see her. We embraced for a while. Laughing and crying. It felt as if I had been away for years yet it had only been about a month and a half. Moments later, she helped me with the bag and we walked to the house.

During the drive, I spent almost an hour visualizing my mom's reaction when she saw me. Mostly it would settle for disappointment given that she thinks I have been engaging in prostitution. I couldn't see any other reaction and when I got tired, I stopped thinking about it and left it to fate. Though I wouldn't stop hoping it would turn out well. Here I am now, staring in her eyes with all the courage and confidence I can gather. All I see is happiness and gratitude. Not a single hint of disappointment as I had thought. And it makes my heart swell with happiness.

"Oh, my child," she comes to me and pulls me in for a hug. I embrace her tightly as more tears flow. My heart feels the need to explain so that there won't be misunderstandings. I would hate to have her thinking that I have been stooping so low. She never taught me that even though for a minute I did think it a solution.

"Mamaa, you have to know that I did not do anything that father must have said to you. I did not--" I say burying my head in the crook of her neck as warm tears continue streaming their way down my cheeks.

"Sssh. I know," she hushes. "I didn't believe a thing he said," she says in an assuring voice.

Deep down I knew she wouldn't believe him but given my circumstances, it would not be so hard to be convinced. It was an easy way out but every cheap way put seems to have an expensive price in the end. Unless you're lucky to escape it.

Salima comes and joins us. It's becoming too emotional my eyes can't even see. Tears have clogged them. If it had always been us it would have been paradise. Speaking of which, my father must be out if he is not here by now. It's good to know that. At least I will have time with my mother and Salima.