Letters to Andee

Chapter 6

CHAPTER 6

ANDEE'S POV

Esther is right...

I know she is...

I don't know what's wrong with me. I'm not ready for any of this and I can't handle the pressure of the situation. I'm usually great under pressure. During Softball games when the outcome of the game rested on whether or not I struck out the next batter, I can completely handle that. I could do that no problem.

The pressure of having a baby inside of me, the baby of a celebrity, the baby of Harry Styles, is too much for me at the moment. This is supposed to be the time I can work through things. I'm not showing yet so the press won't be catching on yet. This is the time I should be getting used to the idea of being a mom.

I'm going to be a mom.

I have to sit down on a bench in the airport to catch my breath.

I will be responsible for a little person's life, in fact I already am. I have to watch what I eat and drink. And after they're born I will take care of them.

I've always wanted kids, I love kids, but something about this one being mine is starting to scare me. It's not like I hold them for twenty minutes and hand them back to their mom, this time I'm the mom. I'm the one people will be handing the baby back to. I'm the one who will be getting up in the middle of the night to settle their cries and I'm the one who is going to have to do this all by myself if I don't tell Harry.

In twenty minutes I am in front of the door to my childhood home.

After knocking my mom opens the door and I see the surprise on her face.

"Andee?" she asks.

"Mom, I need to talk to you..." I sniffle; she smiles sadly and pulls me inside.

  NIALL'S POV

Essi continues to shake in my arms as she keeps crying.

I'm really worried about her. She's been distant lately and I can tell something is wrong, but she hasn't told me yet. I trust her and I know that she'll tell me eventually but I want to know now. I want to be able to help her with whatever she's going through, that's what you do in relationships. I'm here for her and she's there for me. Even though we're not in the same place together for too long we're there for each other. It makes it really hard that I can't talk to her about these things in person; it's always over the phone and at random times.

"Baby, what's wrong?" I whisper, my cheek pressed against the top of her head.

She shakes her head against my chest and takes in a long shaky breath.

"Nothing..." she sighs.

I pull her head away from my chest and stare into her blue eyes, stroking the left over tears from her cheeks.

"Then why are you crying?" I smile slightly. My eyes dart all over her face and land on her lips, I want to kiss her so badly. She reaches up and wraps her hands around my wrists, pulling my hands into hers as she stares into my eyes.

"I don't know..." she sighs and rewraps my arms around her then brings her hands up to my chest and they rest there as I pull her closer. "I just missed you a lot." she whispers looking straight into my eyes.

I can't wait any longer as I lean in to kiss her. Her lips move in sync with mine as I smile into the kiss, so happy to have her here with me, even if it's only for a little while.

**

"ESS!!!" I hear Louis scream from across the dressing room when we arrive. After some more kissing and hugging in the airport and grabbing a bite of food for Essi we drove straight to the venue so we could have our last show in Melbourne.