Forever Together

Chapter 80

Stasia sighed, "There's no point in staying if y'all won't let me talk. I was going to come back when everyone calmed down."

Joon looked around and told the guys not to interrupt her. "Go ahead, Stasia. What do you want to say?"

It's intimidating to be the center of their attention, she mumbled that she wished she could drink and Hobi snorted, "that's the last thing we need, you drunk and flirty. We wouldn't accomplish anything." He's not wrong, but still.

She took a deep breath and started to talk. "I'm not leaving; it was different when it was just Aimes and me. But I would NEVER take your children away from you. I didn't have parents, so I would never take them away from their fathers. I wanted to say thank you. I appreciate everything that you have done for me and Ami. You didn't have to, but you took us in and loved us. You stepped in to be her fathers and loved her like she was your own. But I need help. I'm clearly not over Noah, and the guilt of his death is affecting me more than I thought it would. I need to see someone professionally, I think."

 Tae frowned just a bit, "you can talk to us, you know that right?" 

"I do, but what if that isn't enough?"

"Then you go to a professional. Try talking to us first, please. We want to help you," Joon was practically begging. 

So she did; she told them everything she was feeling. She told them how, deep down, she wasn't worthy of them. That she could never forgive herself for what she did to Noah, that she loved them too much to ever leave them, but she shouldn't keep them. She should take the kids and get a house to live in; she'd never take them from Korea or keep the kids away from them. But she shouldn't be this happy; she didn't deserve it. Then she fainted. 

When Stasia woke up in the hospital, she turned to her left, and Seokjin was in the chair. "We really have to stop meeting like this?" she joked. 

He snapped his head up, "Finally, you are awake." He was super serious. "Stasia, did you know that you were hurting yourself by getting pregnant so many times?"  

"What are you talking about? I mean, it's not the greatest on your body, but it's not that bad."

"Stasia, you've been fainting a lot lately. You are always tired. Did you know that you are highly anemic?"

"I'm tired a lot because I have seven men to keep sexually satisfied and four children with another on the way. If I weren't tired, I wouldn't be normal," she said with a pointed look.

He sighed, "There's more to it than that? You need to take iron pills, and we have to make sure you rest more."

Stasia snorted, "does that mean that you guys will stay off of me so I can rest more?"

He was actually mad. "If that's what it takes, then yes. Stasia, this is serious."

He was so concerned that she didn't have the heart to tell him she'd been anemic her entire life. "Oppa, I'll be okay. I promise. I fainted because I'm pregnant and I didn't eat anything today. Now, can we go home and eat something?"

The Dr said they could leave since she was up and feeling okay. When they got in the car, he drove them straight to get food. Then he parked in a parking garage. They ate in silence, but she noticed he was barely eating anything.

"Oppa?" He wouldn't look at her, let alone answer with more than a hum. "Where is everyone else? I was surprised that no one else came to the hospital."

"I wouldn't let them. They wanted me to talk to you." She looked at him, and he sighed, "I've given this speech so many times now, but I'm going to change it up. Do you really want to leave? If you do, I'll help you go."

She was speechless, and she started tearing up. "You, you want me to go?"

"No, not at all, but I can't keep convincing you to stay every time you want to run. I want nothing more than to spend the rest of my life with you, but you don't seem to want that, and I love you enough to let you go. Yeah, the guys will be pissed, but in the end, they'll realize I'm right."

She sat there looking at this incredibly handsome and kind man. He was willing to let her go if she wanted; he just wanted her to be happy. She crawled over to his lap and laid her head on his shoulder. "Oppa, you'd really let me go?"

He took a deep breath and whispered, "I'd do anything to make happy Stasia. I thought you'd know that by now."

She did; she pulled her head back and kissed him. She intended it to be a quick kiss, but it was Seokjin, and she could never just kiss him quickly. The kiss turned into something else. When they were both catching their breath in the afterglow, she whispered into his chest, "Can we stay here just a little longer?" He rubbed her back and sang her to sleep. 

Stasia dreamed about Noah, and they sat on the park bench again. She turned to look at him, "I'm sorry, Noah. You must hate me." 

He just laughed, "I could never hate you. No matter what you do. Granted, when I threw you into Jungkooks arms, I didn't think you'd end up pregnant with his baby."

"I didn't either."

"Are you happy? Are they good to you and Ami?"

"They are amazing; they love us so much. You'd never know that Ami wasn't theirs. They are so good with her. Can you forgive me?"

"There's nothing to forgive Stasia. I've loved you since the first time I saw you; we had a great life together, although it was shorter than I intended. But I love you enough to want you to be happy." He placed his hand on her tummy. She wasn't really showing, but she understood the intention. "Be happy, raise your babies. I'm sorry I couldn't be there for ours, but I'm thankful that you found men who could step up. Don't beat yourself up anymore; it's okay to let me go. I'll be here waiting for you on the other side. I love you, Anastasia Peridot Lee. You are so amazing, and I'm not surprised that they fell in love with you." He gave her a quick kiss, winked at her, and then walked away.