𝐂𝐑𝐎𝐒𝐒𝐑𝐎𝐀𝐃𝐒, b.

[̲̅t][̲̅w][̲̅e][̲̅n][̲̅t][̲̅y] [̲̅o][̲̅n][̲̅e] - florida is iffy

wednesday, august 24th, 2016

"fuck, that hurts." i whine, screwing my eyes shut as jahseh continues to push himself in.

"we can stop anytime, yanno." he says with a raised eyebrow, and i wave him off, shaking my head. "keep going. i didn't raise a bitch."

jahseh laughs lowly and follows my instructions, pushing himself in a little further. i can't help but to clutch the sheets tightly, loathing this stabbing feeling in my lower abdomen, wondering what the hell is so great about sex if this is what you have to go through to get to the good stuff.

"we're almost done." he mumbles. i feel him put his fists into the bed, pushing himself the rest of the way in.

"you ready?" he asks. i feel his eyes on me so i open mine, meeting his. "yeah, go ahead."

as jahseh slowly slides himself in and out, the stabbing pain increases and tears form in my eyes.

"this is bullshit, jahseh." i mumble.

"we can stop anytime you want." he wipes my tears away, still continuing his actions.

it's hard to fight back the flashbacks of finneas as they threaten to resurface and spoil this whole experience.

"stop thinking." jahseh mumbles, leaning down, the space between our lips basically nonexistent. "just let it happen. stop thinking about it."

"i'm trying." i whisper.

this time jahseh actually puts his lips on mine, engaging in a slow kiss with me, i'm assuming to get my mind away from finneas, and away from the intense pain that i'm feeling.

it takes a few more minutes of pain before the pain finally dies down. a teeny tiny bit of pleasure can be felt amidst the pain, and this little light in my tunnel gives me enough courage to keep going with this.

"let me know when it stops hurting." he says softly, leaving kisses on my neck and spreading my legs apart with his arms, the feeling of something moving inside of me still an entirely new sensation. the pleasure becomes a little more prominent, and an involuntary smile curls up on my face as i let myself indulge in what jahseh's doing to me.

a moan escapes my lips and the mere sound makes my heart beat even faster. i didn't even know i was going to make that sound-

"do that again." jahseh's raspy voice whispers in my ear, creating an intense tingle in my private area. then i feel his soft, warm tongue on the tender skin of my neck, and that soft feeling is instantly torn away from me when i feel his teeth sink into my skin. for some reason this pain is euphoria, and i let out a quiet moan, not being able to take this much pleasure at once.

his teeth are out of my skin and now it's just his lips, sucking on that same spot, while he's moving in and out of me at a steady pace. i let out a shaky breath, letting my head rest on the pillow as my toes curl, the feeling of jahseh taking up my entire being.

"jah-"

"billie."

my eyes shoot open and my eyebrows furrow, confused.

"what?" i ask.

"i've been trying to wake you up, you good? you keep moaning and shit." he says, looking down at me, his body sat up straight in the bed.

"what-" pain inbetween my legs hits me full force, and i finally understand the significance of whatever dream i was having.

"what, were you thinking about yesterday or something?" he says, his words curious, but a cocky laugh escapes his lips as he tilts his head. "you can't be that hooked already."