Lovely (Complete)

17

I felt like a child as I sat in the waiting room of the hospital. I clutched my bag close to my chest as I played with the end of my shirt. I watched a little boy play with a red car on the floor as I waited. Before long the little boy was called back and I was alone again. I watched the clock go by, making up little fantasies as I waited.

Soon I was called back as well, making me start my appointment.

I made my way to a small room with a lot of green plants scattered around it. I sat in a blue chair across from a large desk with a monitor on it. The window gave little light to the room as the lamps gave most of it.

A woman smiled and got up, giving me her hand to shake. I smiled nervously and shook it as she introduced herself and let me sit down in the blue chair.

The session started off with her asking me simple questions, getting to know me, and how the past couple of days have gone. Slowly, we started to talk about more important things, things that were too heavy to tell the average person. We outlined what we would talk about during the 50-minute session and swiftly got started.

In those 50 minutes, I told her about my now non-existent relationship with my ex-boyfriend, Axel. I told her how we met on his campus and how we started having lunch with each other ever so often. The college was close to where I worked so most of the students would get lunch there. One day Axel came in with some of his friends who wanted to pig out on cake and sweets. Ever so often he would sit with me during lunch break, since we both had it during the same time, and eat together.

Soon, he moved out of his house and permanently moved on campus. There we would hang out during weekends and that slowly transformed into study sessions in his house. By the time he graduated high school he invited me to his graduation party where I met his parents and started an evergrowing relationship with them. At his graduation party, he also confessed his feelings for me, asking me if I wanted to start a relationship with him.

That was the story of how I met him, on how I met the guy who slowly withered away like a ghost in my mind.

My therapist was understanding, telling me that still standing on top of everything like a victor was something to be proud of. If it was something to be proud of then why did it weigh me down so much. I asked her that question, she told me something that I'd never thought I'd hear.

"Noah, life challenges you every day, standing on top of something like being a victor is 100% something to be proud of. But we surround ourselves with people not to fill the void but to lean on them. Leaning and depending on people is how we get through life. In reality, we can get through things alone but depending on people helps us go through life." My therapist explained, closing her notebook and setting it down next to her.

With that closing statement, our session ended and we said our goodbyes for the week.

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Jacob showed up to my apartment early in the morning the next day, apologizing for leaving me hanging yesterday. I laughed and told him not to worry about it and invited him to have breakfast with Ajax and I.

Ajax had just finished serving up my omelet when he realized that Jacob was here and automatically started making another one. Jacob and I sat on the patio, talking and enjoying the rainy air as Ajax made breakfast. Ever so often I would turn around to Axel humming away at his rock songs while cooking breakfast. I could help but show a small smile on my face as he sang songs by classic rock bands.

I watched the rain hit the patio as Ajax brought Jacob and me a cup of tea. The heat from the tea warmed my face and hands up, making me smile slightly. The calming atmosphere gave me a chance to finally collect my thoughts and be around the people that I care about without being in a stressful setting with them.

Lightning lit the sky as clouds thundered down the wind. I smiled, feeling the air slowly clear from pollution from cars to fresh, cool air.

Jacob and Ajax began playing a video game on the TV while I sat on the couch and read my book. Ever so often I'd hear them cursing about how unfair something in the game was. Trying to keep my laughter quiet, I started focusing more and more on them than the book itself.

Ajax noticed me watching them and called me over, telling me to sit in front of him and take the controller. I sat crisscrossed in front of him as his hands held mine in the position that I needed to play at. Slowly, I began playing the game better, getting points and killing the enemies. I grimaced at the amount of blood during the game and eventually handed the game controller to Ajax. He laughed and took the controller from me and started playing another round with Jacob as I finished the last chapter of my book.

I sighed and set the newly finished book on the table next to me and got up to go into the bathroom. I got dressed into more formal clothes that I could wear out, those clothes being a large tan hoodie with black jeans paired with a pair of tan converse that Axel's parents had bought me a long time ago.

Ajax and Jacob had noticed that I was walking out so they decided to join me. Instead of walking in the rain as I would normally do, Ajax drove Jacob and me to the library. We grabbed some drinks to cool us down before going into the cool library.

I smiled and ran my fingers down the spines of the books as I looked through the book selections. The same jazz music as before filled the air as I looked through the fiction section. Out of the corner of my eye, I see Ajax reading the cover of some novel while Jacob laughing over the cover of another. Ajax looked over at the book with an amused expression, turning around and laughing as soon as he saw it.

I smiled slightly at the sight of them having fun before picking out the books I wanted and going over to the check-out. Before I could hand the woman my card Ajax grabbed my hand and handed the woman his card. I sighed and grabbed his card from him and handed her mine. This small game lasted a few more seconds before Ajax held both my arms behind my back with one of his, victoriously handing the woman his card.

I huffed in annoyance and grabbed my newly bought books.

Ajax drove Jacob home before finally taking me home. As he made dinner I sat on the couch and begun my new books, rubbing my hands over the cover. Once dinner was done Ajax walked over to me, wrapping his arms around my waist and pulling me into his chest. My book fell out of my hand and closed on the ground, making me lose my place in the book.

I sighed and shot Ajax a glare which he just kissed away. He buried his face in the corner of my neck as he felt around the floor for my book. He eventually handed me the book and let me read again as he fell asleep.

I watched him slowly nod off, his body going limp as he melted into comfort. He was exhausted, bags under his eyes and body limp.

As he fell asleep, I feel bonded to my book. Encased with the story and what it was worth kept me up. Soon enough the sun was starting to rise and soon it would be time to get ready to go to work with Ajax.

We got ready and took our showers before we headed to his job. A routine fell on us, one that we were both happy with. A new group of teenagers would show up to our cafe for their highschool study sessions.

Ajax would often talk to them, just your average small talk about there school. Ajax would tell them about his high school days while I just watched in amusement. Although they were complete strangers they had a special place in our hearts. Especially Ajax, who would talk about the teenagers when we got home. I smiled at his story's about them, happy to listen to something he was interested in. Although I wouldn't talk to them they interested me.

After dinner I headed over to my therapy session, getting ready to pour out my heart for the second time this week.

My therapist started off with her usual questions, how I've been feeling these past couple of days and how I've been feeling in general. We talked about how the old memories of Axel in the form of night terrors left and I could finally sleep at night.

It finally seemed like I lived a normal life...

And it was exhilarating.