Korra's Love

Chapter 20 - Not love

Korra sat in the doorway rubbing the tears from her eyes. She needed to do something......she couldn't handle thinking about what had just happened. She pulled herself up and went back into the bathroom to wash her face. Ginger had stayed close by the entire time and followed her back in. She placed her hand on Korra's shoulder. "You ok?" Korra turned and glared at her. "Why did you kiss me?! I just lost my girlfriend because of you!" Ginger looked surprised then stitched her eyebrows together. "No honey, you lost your girlfriend because of YOU. I did kiss you....but you pulled me in and continued the kiss...even after Kuvira said something to you about it." Korra put her hands on the sink and hung her head down. Ginger was right. She could have pushed her off immediately....but she didn't. Why? Why was this such a problem for her? She pulled out her phone to text Asami but didn't know what she could possibly say that would help the situation. Her brain kept switching back and forth between thinking this wasn't that big of a deal to how could she do this to the woman she was in love with? Maybe she wasn't in love. Maybe she wasn't capable of that. Tears spilled out of her eyes again. She didn't want to think about it anymore. "Hey...you wanna get out of here?" She asked Ginger as she wiped her eyes, stuffing down all of her emotions. "Sure, what do you have in mind?" Korra thought for a minute. "Let's hit the bar down the street, maybe shoot some pool." Ginger grabbed her hand. "Sounds like a plan." She pulled her out to the back entrance. They made their way down the alley and out to the main strip. The bar was about a block away. They walked in silence and even after everything that had happened, Korra could still feel the buzz of sexual energy between them. Somehow it helped to feel that. Whether it was alcohol or Ginger she needed something to drown out her feelings of guilt and heartbreak.

"What are you ladies drinking tonight?" The bartender had a soothing tone to her voice. Korra had switched into her predatory mode but didn't want it to seem obvious with Ginger right there. She looked at the the bartender through half lidded eyes and lowered her voice. "What do you recommend?" The bartender leaned in close to Korra's face. "I would recommend you don't flirt with the bartender." She said with a smirk. Korra scrunched up her eyebrows in annoyance but then smiled. "I'll have a shot of tequila, Ginger what would you like?" Ginger put her arm around Korra's waist and spoke in a low tone into her ear. "Tequila sounds perfect." "Make that two shots please." They found the pool table and played a few games. Korra easily winning each time. A couple more shots and Ginger couldn't keep her hands off of the intern. Korra was drinking beer between shots and was far more drunk than Ginger "Why don't we go back to my place it's not far from here." Ginger offered. Korra squinted at her through hazy eyes. "I'll....I'll call an uber we can....uh...go to my p...place instead." Ginger wrapped her arms around Korra's neck. "Whatever you say cutie."

Asami sat in her car sobbing, resting her head on the steering wheel. This hurt more than anything she had ever experienced....besides the death of her mother. Kuvira sat next to her rubbing her back. "I'm so sorry Asami. How can I help?" Asami shook her head. "I don't know." Tears rolling down her cheeks. "Will you come hang out with me at my place?" Kuvira owed Asami at least that, considering all she had done for her. "Ya of course...whatever you need." The ride to the mansion was mostly quiet except for an occasional sniffle from Asami. Kuvira kept thinking of different things she could say but nothing seemed like it would be helpful. Asami probably just needed her to listen when she was ready to talk. They parked in a massive garage and walked a short distance to the side door leading to a small entry way at the back of the lounge room. "Make yourself comfortable, I'll get some drinks." Asami left and came back with the whole liquor cart. "I think some of that whiskey is in order don't you?" Kuvira smiled. "Sure maybe that will help." Asami poured their drinks and sat across from Kuvira. "I feel like such an idiot, you warned me about all of this, and you were 100% right." Kuvira looked down at her drink. "You know what? You're right. But, Asami.....you're different." Asami took a big gulp of her drink. "What are you talking about?" Kuvira sighed. "I was with Korra for 3 months. It's not a long time but it was long enough to learn how she was. She NEVER looked at me the way she looks at you." Asami seemed stunned. "That can't be true, you two were best friends...together all the time." "You're right, we were best friends...and we should have stayed that way. At least half of the time we were together I knew 2 things. She had been with other women while we were together and she was in love with you. It was very clear to me even though I ignored it til the end." Asami started to feel angry again, it was pushing away her sadness. Korra had always made her so angry. "How? How could she do that to you...to me? She knew you loved her...I loved her." Asami began crying again. "I do love her...still." Kuvira got up and poured another drink. "Can I ask you a personal question?" She asked. "Yes if you think its relevant to this conversation." Asami raised her eyebrows in curiosity. "Well....does Korra tell you she loves you often? Especially when you're having sex, does she ever say it then?" Asami felt a hard blush fall across her cheeks. "Uh...yes....she says it all the time." Kuvira sat back down and leaned forward resting her elbows on her knees. "Listen, you knew she was like this...you helped her sort through the mess she made with me, Suyin and Zhu Li. I'm not saying her behavior is ok, and I can't believe I'm defending her....but maybe you're the one she needs the most, to help her get away from her own bad behavior. She's admitted to it being a problem, she's also shown evidence that she wants to change. Addiction isn't an easy burden no matter what kind it is. I know that Korra loves you. I think everybody can see that, she doesn't hide it very well. I guess it's now just a matter of how much you love her and how much you're willing to go through for her." Asami rubbed her forehead. Kuvira smiled. "Hey maybe you need to go about this the way an engineer would. I mean Korra has been your project for quite a while now. Help her get all the pieces in place so that she will work correctly..." Asami let out a loud chuckle. "That's very funny. I don't know... this really hurts, but maybe I do need to change my perspective. I'm so in love with her." "I know the feeling." Kuvira mused. "Thanks Kuvira I appreciate your help.....I know this can't be easy for you to watch....I'll take everything you said into consideration."