Are we really living?//TWD

FORTY-TWO

I know I haven't updated in maybe a month or more but I'm exhausted cause ya know toxic fam tingz. 

I stroke Carl's bangs that sweep to the side, looking up into the stars of the night with his head laying on my stomach.

Right now we're camping out by the side of the road. That's what we're doing now, just walking up and down the road.

No ammo, so no guns. So extra work into killing the walkers. I've been off my meds for a month now.

"That one is the Little Dipper, if you focus on it you could see it as clear as day," I say in a soft tone pointing to the sky, cause I can tell he's getting tired.

"How did you learn English so well? I bet you can even do an American accent." Carl jokes looking at me with heavy eyelids and I chuckle.

"At first it was Maggie when I first came to America  'The Land of the Free' as they call it. She taught me, she had the effort to teach me. I am so grateful for her." I say massaging in his scalp as I combed through it.

"Then it was when the television, cost a lot of money so when I saved up enough, I got one," I say smiling to myself.

" I had never had one before, my father had the radio and the newspaper but when I turned it on. I liked the colors, I liked how it  came together so elegantly."

"Then a channel called MTV started to produce music and that's how I found out about the bands and artists like David Bowie, Nirvana, Queen, Mick Jagger, The Rolling Stones, and Elvis Presley. I fell in love." I whisper and exhale through my nose.

I grin when I hear low snoring coming from Carl, and I take my jacket from under my head then I drape it over his body. I kiss my pointer finger and middle finger then I place them on his forehead covered in his hair.

I stuff my thick curly hair under my head using it as a pillow. I guess there are some pros to having big hair.

I continue sprinting towards, the horn trailing behind Glenn with Rick a couple of inches in front of me.

Glenn stops and turns to Rick. "Try again," Glenn said and Rick huffed.

"Tobin, it's not stopping. Light it up. You hear me?" Rick says and only hears static crackling feedback. I look around and I hear a walker snarling. "Tobin!" Rick says then exhales. "Michonne."

"Got it," Said Michonne. I keep running with my grip tightening on my machete as I kept sprinting. My kids better are okay.

If something happens to either of them, I don't know what I'll do.

"Rick!" Daryl on the radio says, thank god he's okay.

"I'm here," Rick responds.

"What the hells goin' on back there?" Daryl questions and I chuckle then I snatch the radio from Rick as we continue running.

"A tea party!" I yell enthusiastically, hoping he would pick up my sarcasm then Rick takes the radio back.

"Half of them broke off. They're going to Alexandria." Rick responds as we continue running towards home, then there's that silence on the radio. I hate that silence.

"Towards you?" I hear Abraham butt in through the radio.

"We ran ahead. There's a horn or something. Loud coming from the east. It's not stopping." Rick says and I feel a bit dizzy. I can't have a seizure, not now.

"I'm gonna gas it up, turn back," Daryl says and I shake my head then take a deep breath. I thought the military was hard.

"We have it. Keep going." Rick responds on the radio.