Diamond in the Making

29. Flaws Emphasize

♥ Nate ♥

Love can make you weak or it can feed your strength. It can fill the cracks of the breaking wall or it can let it crumble to the ground.

With Zara I feel strength. She compliments each of my weaknesses making them tolerable. I was ready to put a bullet between Bradley's eyes but she brought me to my senses. Her touch alone scares the darker side of me and forces it to be quiet while my mind thinks rationally. I couldn't kill Bradley yet, he owes me. The begging look in Zara's eyes forced me to see what Richards truly does to me. I have devilish thoughts just at the sight of him. Zara is too pure for this side of me. She is an angel amongst a world of devils or at least I thought she was.

As time passes, I see more of her in the light than I initially saw. The first insight was when she pulled a gun on me, then she told me she's done some 'messed up shit,' then punched Ian and after seeing her throw a knife, with more precision than I've ever seen, I'm questioning if she is who she says she is.

In my line of work, true love with someone is rare. Was I naive to think that I found it? I thought I finally found the woman who I would spend the rest of my days with. Is this really love or have I just fallen into the hands of a temptress? I've been fooled before but I want this to be different.

I'm in too deep now, there's no turning back. Even if she doesn't love me like she says she does, I love her too much to walk away from this. I've never questioned her before this moment. Everything about her seems genuine but there are a few things that just don't add up.

Zara didn't spare me a glance on the drive. She has a right to be upset but so do I. I thought she would trust me enough to tell me little things like when her birthday is but I guess not. Either way, we need to have a conversation.

When we got back to my house, she walked in with her head down and she went right up the stairs. I just want her to open up about what today means, if she did maybe then I wouldn't question our relationship.

Roman, Theo and I went into the office to devise a plan. We need to find Bradley's exact whereabouts and we need to ambush him but this time it will be on our terms. After a few hours of discussing and calling a few other people from our team, the sun was setting.

"Roman," I said as I opened a few of my desk drawers trying to find the shiny metal object inside. I pulled out a silver pocket knife then handed it to him. "Hit it right here," I pointed to a distinguished part of the painting a few feet from him.

Roman is the most skilled soldier I have. Zara knew what she was doing, I could tell. She didn't want to kill Bradley, she just needed him to drop the gun. There was a target and she hit it on the bullseye.

Roman looked confused but he still threw the knife and it hit an inch from the target.

"What was the point of that?" He asked annoyed that he missed the target.

"What do you guys think of Zara?" I asked avoiding his question as I lit a cigarette.

"I like her," Theo said and Roman said "me too."

"But is she too good to be true?" They both looked at me curiously after I asked the question.

The room went quiet as we thought of possible signs that she could be a rat. I enlightened them both on my suspicions of her. Theo said maybe we should do a background check but I don't want to invade her privacy, I refuse to believe there is a need for that. I still love her and I want to believe that she will tell me the truth. There's only one way to rid us of our thought that Zara is a phoney.

As if on cue there's a knock at the office door. "Come in," I called out.

The door cracked open and she stood in the doorway, cautious not to enter the room as she held her arms around her stomach. She looked vulnerable with tear stained cheeks and puffy red eyes. The sight made my heart ache, I inhaled the smoke trying to relieve the pain.

"Can I borrow your car?" She asked quietly.

"Where do you need to go?"

"I just need to go somewhere," she said, getting agitated and letting her arms fall to her side as she tapped her foot.

"Before you go," Roman started to say as he pulled the knife from the painting. "Can you hit right here?" He asked as he handed her the knife then pointed to the same spot he aimed for.

Without hesitation, like she knew this was coming, she threw the knife hitting it exactly where it was expected, cutting right through the canvas and sticking to the wall. Theo, Roman and I exchanged looks. We knew this was a bad sign.

"Who the hell are you?" Theo asked as she looked at him with doe eyes.

"Who taught you how to do that?" Roman asked. I sat back in my chair, I didn't want to question her but it needed to be done. I am a coward for this but I couldn't question her myself.

"A person," she answered snarkily.

"Sit," Theo said as he pointed to the couch with his gun. I would never let him or anyone shoot her, it's just a scare tactic.

"Who do you work for?" Roman asked.

"What? No one," she said as she looked up to me for help. I couldn't help her, I needed some answers. I trust the truth behind her words, I just didn't want to dig for the words myself.

"Who taught you your skills?"

"Are you guys serious?" Theo loaded his gun as she asked that question. She then swallowed the lump in her throat and answered "my dad."

"Who does he work for?" Roman asked, he doesn't know what happened to her parents. That's something she told me and I didn't want to betray her by spreading the word.

"No one."

Roman looked to me asking if he should take this further and I just shook my head.

"This would be easier if you started talking," Theo said, rolling his eyes.

"My dad was a fighter," we all just looked at her confused. Was she speaking metaphorically? "Like underground wrestling and shit. He taught me some things." Her head swung low, I felt bad for forcing her to talk about this.

"If he was a fighter he didn't deal with knives and guns. So where's all that from?" They were drilling her harder, I wanted to reach out and comfort her but is she even on my side?

The room was quiet for a minute as the question circled the air. Zara's eyes wandered the room as memories, she pushed so deep inside, were rising to the surface.

Staring at the wall she began "I was involved in some stupid street gang when I was a kid."

"What gang?" Theo asked as curiosity ate away.

"They called themselves the wolves."

She was oblivious to it all which made this better but worse at the same time. Her confession broke her, it's like the innocence she held was being consumed by her recollection of previous events.

Roman and Theo backed off seeing the effect the words spoken had on her. We all knew she wasn't a rat. A rat never felt remorse. I was stupid to think she was one.

"Can I go now?" She asked as she dried the tears that spilled from her eyes.

"I'll go with you," I said, getting up from my chair.

"No, I'm going alone," she said coldly towards me and I understood why but it still hurt.

Zara left the room most likely heading for the garage while the three of us looked at each other in disbelief. If Zara had a relation with the wolves she would be our enemy but her expression said it all. She hated them as much as we do.

All my doubts were diminished. I should have never questioned her, she deserves better than me but I'm selfish and I want her to myself. I love her and I will always be there for her. I will put the pieces of her broken soul back together which is why I picked up my keys and I followed her towards our far unknown destination. I have her a head start but I would catch up with the gps.

When I see her face to face, I will take accountability for my irrational assumption of her. I will do whatever it takes to make it up to her because I can't live without her.