Different Sides To The Same Story

Chapter ten - Jason Dalton

   After Callie finishes I drive everyone there. Because we don't have enough seats, Lucas and Seth sit in the back with our skateboards and get a head start on the smoking. Callie and Jaime sit in the backseat and Lily sits up front with me. The pool house is a bit of a drive, so I turn on the radio, turning it up loud.

When we finally arrive, we have to jump the fence. We don't come here a lot but fairly often, so everyone knows the drill, but Lily. I lead her over the gate and through the back gardens by our connected hands. We've gotten pretty used to holding hands and it's become a habit, even if we're not trying to prove to anyone we're together.

When we enter the abandoned pool I hear Lil mutter a 'wow' but I don't bring attention to it as everyone drops inside the drained pool and start boarding up and down it.

"C'mon let me teach you how." I offer, for the fifth time. The other times she declined saying it was too dangerous.

She rolls her eyes, smiling, "Fine." she says, stretching the syllables.

I grin, as I hop down into the pool, dropping my board down. She climbs down the ladder, walking over to me and staring at my skateboard like it's gonna jump at her. "Take my hands." I tell her as I put out both my hands, palms facing the broken skylight. She grabs my hands and steps onto the board. "Move your first foot, yeah like that, just angle it a bit more, and put your toes on the screws." I tell her as she complies. "Kay now put your back foot straight and over the screw." She does. "Great now we're just gonna roll." I say, as I walk a bit, supporting her with my hands. "Now if you lift your back foot and push..." I tell her, she does, looking a little wonky. "If you lean backwards with your heel you'll turn that way." I say, as she does, turning us a bit, she goes too far and I have to pull her back, making sure she won't fall. "Next if you lean with the toes of your front foot and lean towards me, you'll start to turn." I tell her.

She does, but like last time she leans too far and before I can realize she falls towards me, knocking both of us over. I lose my balance landing straight on my back and breaking Lily's fall. She lifts her head from my chest to look at me, "Told you it was dangerous." She brags, not moving off me. I hear the others laugh a bit but then they focus back to their skating.

"Yeah for me." I joke, but in actuality It barely hurt. "Let's take a smoke break." I tell her, as she climbs off me. I don't bother retrieving my board since it flew to the other end of the pool. "Seth!" I yell, even though he's pretty close to me. He catches my drift stepping off his board and kicking it to his hand. He rifles through his pocket pulling out a plastic baggy and throwing it to me, before dropping his board and returning to skating.

There's about five joints in the bag, I count as I leap up on the edge of the pool, with my legs hanging off the edge. Lily joins me, crossing her legs beside me, as I light the tip of the joint in my mouth.

I hit it again before handing it to Lily. Besides the other time at the skate park where I blew my smoke in her face, Lily's only been high one other time, where she actually smoked it herself. She puffs it holding the air for a second before releasing it, like I taught her to.

"So what'd you and Miles' money bag talk about?" I question, chuckling to myself about the nickname.

She shrugs, "He texted me asking to meet up, we talked about how my parents are getting divorced then-" I cut her off, a bit shocked at what she said,

"Wait, your parents are splitting up?" I question.

She nods, as she hands me the blunt, "Yeah, that's why I didn't go to school the last couple days, I had pack and shit for the move." She says it as if it's the simplest thing ever.

"Why didn't you tell me?" I ask, kinda hurt and confused but hiding that.

She shrugs not picking up on my pain, "It's not a big deal." She tells me, as I puff the joint.

"Well what else did you two talk about?" I ask, moving on from the last topic.

"You." She states, making my heart beat raise. "Just the usual rumors and shit." She tells me, taking the joint out of my hands making me laugh.

"You know I've never heard what people say about me." I hint at her, "What'd he say?" I ask.

She purses her lips, sighing, "He called you a low life, like my dad did." She pauses before continuing, "He also said he heard someone say you cut yourself." That comment makes my heart stop, "Of course I don't believe it." She assures me, acting like it would be the worst thing.

"Why is that like a deal breaker or something?" I joke, but in reality I'm honestly curious.

She shakes her head, "No but like, people that hurt themselves are seriously messed up, like something's seriously wrong if you do that." She says honestly. I don't say anything. I just silently pass her the blunt and push off the edge. "Where're you going?" She questions.

"I forgot I told my sister I'd watch her kids tonight." I lie, "Seth, you can take the truck to drive everyone home when they're ready." I tell him, tossing him the keys.

"Jason?" Lily says, jumping off the edge of the pool and grabbing my arm after I pick up my skateboard. "How are you gonna get home?" She asks, worried.

"I'll just skateboard there." I answer simply, before ignoring her and climbing the ladder out of the pool.

I weave my way out of the pool house and past the gate I drop my board as the tears come to my eyes. How could I think she'd actually like me for me? I mean I don't even like me, how could someone like her like me? I'm so fucking stupid.

It was a long drive here, so it's over an hour of skateboarding to get home. When I finally do I'm sweaty and gross. My legs hurt and my eyes are red from crying. I head to the shower, making a pit stop at my bedroom to retrieve some clothes and my blade.

The blade dances on my skin as my mind goes darker and darker. I was dumb enough to really think I belonged with a girl like that. Me. A fucking burn out loser, who has to hurt themself because they're so fucked up in the head.

The blade glides deeper and deeper as I descend down my arm, until the blood is a deep crimson. I don't even bother to stop the bleeding as I enter the shower. Ten new cuts. Ten new marks. Ten new signs that I'm fucked up.

The blood blends with the water and I ignore the stinging sensation it brings. My tears join the blend. I laugh, not because somethings funny but because of the irony that I cut myself because I couldn't be with Lily, and that's the reason Lily couldn't be with me. I'm so fucked up.