As life goes, so do I

Trophies and Titles

Recognition I need.

I desperately crave

for a title, for something "official"

As if it were a decent bandaid. 

"Valedictorian" can not heal me,

but in the very least it would let me be

for a 5 minute moment of pride. 

Now I know there's no real difference, 

between me and those two girls who got the speech. 

I just wasn't what they were looking for, 

too real and raw, instead of pep and smiles. 

Recognition I need. 

I desperately crave

for that sweet cherry on top, 

for a bow to wrap up my senior package

that included everything but college acceptance. 

I should be proud. 

After all, what I've accomplished is quite a feat. 

I've wondered just who I have been trying to prove myself to. 

In the crowd of supportive smiles, the ovation of my family members, 

I spotted the person who wasn't clapping, who grimaced back and smirked. 

As If they won the whole game, 

took the trophy and titles after the last hurrah. 

It has always been me

for recognition I need.

But when standing on the field, 

as the graduation ceremony commenced

I wondered how this event could have played differently. 

Had I given up or passively watch my grades tank, 

I wouldn't be sitting in the front to hear my family cheer. 

Had I given up, the tears that streamed down my face

would have been of defeat.

But no, the tears that bordered my eyes, welled of pride. 

It has always been me 

for recognition I need.