" 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚊𝚛𝚎 𝚕𝚒𝚐𝚑𝚝 ,, || killugon oneshots

𝚌𝚊𝚕𝚕 𝚒𝚗 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚗𝚒𝚐𝚑𝚝

A/N: so this is kinda like hurt/comfort? i don't wanna say angst but yeah. pretty long one shot i guess, 1149 words not counting this a/n

also yes, I REALIZED THAT THEY WOULD NOT HAVE DIFFERENT TIME ZONES FROM WHERE THEY ARE BECAUSE THE FIRST EPISODE DIDN'T SHOW THAT THEY HAD CHANGED TIME ZONES BETWEEN THE TWO LOCATIONS 

[ ~ ]

"I just want to feel again... Something other than sadness."

"Why do you feel so sad?"

"B-Because, I-I don't know what to do anymore."

Surely, Killua's intention hadn't been to have a nightmare. He definitely didn't want that to lead into him waking up, crying, which woke his little sister up. Worst of all, she had to comfort him. Killua hated it, he hated every second of it. He was grateful that Alluka was there, but he hated breaking down on her. It'd been 3 years since him and Gon parted ways, and was the middle of July. Both boys were 17 and hadn't communicated in 6 months. Killua was with Alluka, traveling with and taking care of her, since both of them knew the Zoldyck Estate was definitely not their home.

"Alluka, I-I'm sorry." Killua sobbed, hugging his knees to him. "Y-Your big brother isn't as strong as he tried to be."

"Don't say that! Of course you're strong! You train every day and take care of me and Nanika, so you are strong!" Alluka smiled at him, trying to cheer the white haired boy up.

Killua peeked up at her from his knees. "B-But I can't keep doing that anymore.. N-Not while I feel like this."

"Do you feel sad because you miss him?"

The 17-year-old nodded. "I really really miss him."

"Call him."

"Alluka, it's 2 in the morning, I'm not gonna call Gon right now-"

"He could be somewhere where it's not 2 in the morning!! And even if it is for him, he should be happy that you're calling him and pick up! Isn't... Isn't that how best friends are?" Alluka questioned. Truthfully, she'd only ever known Killua's love and had never had a friend of her own, let alone a best friend, but 6 months prior, Killua and Gon had talked minimum 5 times a week from what she could recall.

Killua's eyes reflected the moonlight from the window as they brimmed with tears once more.

"Yeah.. Yeah, they are."

The white haired teen rubbed his eyes to wipe his tears away before hugging his sister.

"Thank you, Alluka." He whispered, holding her tightly.

The younger Zoldyck smiled and squeezed him. "You always do everything you can to protect me and make me okay. I want to make sure you're okay, too."

"You're gonna make me cry again." Killua sniffled and laughed.

Alluka pulled away from their hug and looked her brother in the eyes. Her face held a determined expression. "Call him, Big Brother."

"Okay."

[ ~ ]

Killua stood outside on their hotel room's balcony, shivering slightly in the late night's cool air. He looked down at his phone, and pressed "Call" on his best friend's contact, bringing it up to his ear.

It rang for a good 5 seconds, before--

"... Hello?" Gon's tired voice crackled through the phone.

"Gon?"

"Killua? Is it... is it really you?"

"Yeah, it is."

"I'm so happy to hear your voice!" He said, excitedly yet tiredly.

Killua wanted to melt right then and there. All sorts of emotions swelled up in his heart. Relief, exhaustion, guilt, happiness, but especially...

Love.

The Transmuter nearly started sobbing again on the spot, but he managed to contain his emotions.

"Glad to hear it.. I'm sorry for calling you so late, it's 2 am where I am right now-"

"Don't be sorry, we haven't spoken in so long, you could have called me at any time whether I was sleeping or not and I would still be so happy!"

Gon's words continued to melt Killua, and chipped away at what was shielding his emotions. He really didn't want to cry, but he also needed to tell him how he felt, the nightmare he had woken up from and cried about in the first place.

And telling Gon about all these things was sure to make him shed tears.

Killua sighed, not knowing what to do.

"Hey, Gon, uhm.. Where are you right now?" He asked, hesitantly.

"I'm actually making a rest stop on Whale Island! I'm with Aunt Mito again!" The Enhancer chirped.

"Whale Island, huh? Wait, isn't it like, 5 am there?" Killua suddenly realized how bad an idea it really was to call him.

"I told you, it's fine!"

"Yeah, but-"

"Killua, it's fine. I'm not mad, so you have no reason to be upset about it, right?"

He considered for a moment.

"Yeah... yeah, okay. Anyways..."

Killua looked up at the moon.

"Do you... think we'd be able to meet up soon?"

"Yeah! I was actually gonna ask if you and Alluka were still traveling and if you would ever be coming near here."

"We are, actually. We're in Zaban City right now."

"That's not that far away if you guys could get an airship or boat ride."

"Yeah... Um, Gon?"

"Yes, Killua?"

The Transmuter sighed again, all of his emotions bubbling in his throat. He swallowed, pushing them back down, desperate to not break down again. Especially not over the first phone call he's had with his best friend in six months.

"Would your aunt be okay if we showed up? I don't know when we'd be able to get an airship or boat."

"I'm sure she wouldn't have a problem, especially because she liked having you over so much!"

Killua blushed, his cheeks tinting pink.

"Okay, thanks... I'll tell Alluka."

"Sounds great!"

"Gon, one more thing..."

"Yeah?"

The white haired teen hesitated.

"When... When we get there, you and I really need to talk."

"Of course! Why wouldn't we?"

"No, I don't mean just catching up. Something happened which is why I called you."

"Oh no! Is something wrong?"

"Alluka and me are fine, don't worry, I'll tell you whenever we get there, just... we have a lot to talk about."

"You sure you don't want to talk right now?"

"It's too important to be said over the phone. I want to tell you in person, Gon."

"O-Oh, okay."

Killua panicked a little, for his friend sounded taken aback.

"It's still really late here, I'll try to call you tomorrow morning, okay? Or sometime soon."

"Yeah. Sweet dreams, Killua! And tell Alluka in the morning that I said hi!"

"Sure thing."

Killua hung up and pressed his phone to his chest, letting out all the breath he didn't realize he'd been holding.

He ran a hand through his fluffy white hair and inhaled, before turning around and opening the door to come inside. The warm air was inviting, and he began to feel sleepy again.

"Alluka?" The teen boy whispered. "Are you still awake?"

"Yeah, I am." She responded, softly. Tiredness was evident in her voice, too.

"How did it go, Big Brother?"

"I'd say good... How do you feel about going to Whale Island?"

Despite how tired the girl was, she beamed. "That would be fun! Isn't that where Gon's from?"

"Yup. And he's there right now."

"So that's our next stop?"

The Transmuter nodded at his younger sister.

Alluka smiled sleepily. "In the morning we can talk about it more, okay?" Killua told her, walking over and tucking her back into bed.

"Okay.." She said, drowsily. Killua pushed her bangs back and kissed her forehead.

"Goodnight, Alluka."

"Goodnight, Big Brother... I love you!"

Killua smiled as he settled himself into bed."I love you, too."

And off to sleep they drifted.