Reach For The Stars (Tommyinnit x Reader)

Chapter 54

Tw// drowning kinda. Mention of self harm and ed. There's not that much other than that it's pretty whole some 🐬 dolphin 🐬

a/n sorry schools is really busy around this time. Don't worry in not ending this book any time soon

Y/n pov

They all ran on the beach like toddlers in a candy store. I smiled as I watched Zoey walk up to me and pull on my hoodie. Niki was also by my side. " y/n are you okay. I was scared to ask what happened if you have asthma like me" she gave me a sweet smile. I bent down to her level.

" I guess you can say Asma is close. I'm sorry I scared you" she nodded and hugged me. Niki walked to join the others. I could t tell her about that panic attack in fear of scaring her. " I know about the scars," she whispered. I looked at her shocked. " www what" I stuttered. I was speechless. She fucking five.

"I see you have scars on your arms. My momma told me if someone has them to hug them and say i love you or it will be okay. My momma told me it was a war between themselves. She told me there are survivors and they need lots of love" she smiled proudly. " Your mama is very smart. I want you to do that as well. It will make their day ''I smiled as she hugged me. We walked over joining the others setting up our towels.

" What's your momma like?" she asked sweetly. Everyone stopped in their tracks and looked at Italy worried. " Zoey lets not ask that question okay" ranboo corrected her. " No, it's fine. She was one of the kindest souls you could ever meet. She always puts others before herself. She helped many people even if they weren't family. She couldn't stand to see people struggling or in pain. It hurt her to know there were people she couldn't help. She would smile at everyone even if her day wasn't going to plan." i pause for a quick second

" She was well loved by everyone because of how kind and grouse she was. Everyone called my mum an angel for the way she treated others. She was a hero to a lot of people. She inspires me everyday to be the best person I can be. I try my best to be my mum but I could never walk in her shoes so I decided to do it my own way. That's why I became a twitch streamer. I knew I could reach people that way and a large amount of them. If my mum could see how far i've come she would be very proud of what i've done for others." I explained and Zoey nodded while everyone stared.

" Why do you say it was?" she asked and Rambo gave her a death. Stare. " She's not here anymore " I said softly and she jumped and hugged me. I had to hug her back so she wouldn't fall. " I'm sorry I didn't mean to hurt you," she started to cry. " no no don't cry. you'll make me cry. You could never hurt me, you just didn't know. Dont worry about it." she nodded as I put her back down wiping her tears.

" now let's have fun, '' Tommy yelled, changing the subject. They all raced over to the volleyball court. While clay blew up the paddle boards. Will walked over and sat next to me. Zoey and niki were playing in the water. " You confuse me sometimes. '' He spoke up, breaking the silence.

"How so" I asked. I couldn't pinpoint how confused I was. " To start you had a panic attack early this morning. You acted almost completely normal after it happened. Well except Karl telling me you looked sick when you realized you were eating. Zoey just asked about your mom and you played it off like it didn't even bother you. Why'' He explained.

" Well I can see how it could confuse you but I'm used to my heart shattering. I'm numb to it unless it involves my ptsd then I freak out. Other than that it's a constant numbness and sadness. " I spoke softly. " Mhm so why didn't you eat? '' He asked, trying to reach deeper. " I was nauseous. '' I told half of the truth. " It's back isn't it'' He looked down at me sadly. Does he mean the eating disorder