Switching Sides | Cedric Diggory vs. Fred Weasley

Chapter 49: Distractions

Dear Fred,

I've been doing some- well, a lot of thinking about Cedric's proposition for tea today. I wish there was some way to know if liking him was okay. These are the times when I especially wish George still talked to me. He'd definitely know what you'd be thinking here. My subconscious version of you keeps reminding me you always just wanted me to be happy, but I hate that what's making me happy is the boy I left you for almost a decade ago. The boy I used to break your heart. 

But, even if I didn't have any reservations and I was willing to just jump into something with Cedric, it doesn't seem like that's an option right now. Isabelle seems to really be taking a toll on him. He's clearly tired and unhappy, and he said there was something to explain?  I wish this wasn't all so confusing. Do I even really like Cedric? Hell, I haven't seen him in 3 years and that was for about 5 minutes. He could be a completely different person now. He could have lost feelings for me. I hope he did. I told him to move on and was with you for years...him still having feelings for me would make this a lot harder. He'd be much harder to resist.

I feel bad even talking about other boys. It feels too soon. I know everyone keeps saying it's not and that it's always going to feel too soon, but the thought of loving someone else the way I love you feels like a betrayal. I know what you'd be saying. That it's not a betrayal, it's just life...but life is really unfair. I miss you too much. 

As much as it hurts me and as much as it's contradicting all of my thoughts from the past twelve hours, I think I will go see Cedric. I just need answers, I guess. I need to know if these feelings could actually be something or if I'm just lonely without you.

I loved you then I love you now and I love you past the moment you died.

Millie stared down at her tear stained notebook. She hated that she was going to see Cedric. It felt wrong, but it also felt so, so right. Part of her was praying Cedric had lost all feelings for her and that he was completely different now then he had been, but based on last nights events those both seemed unlikely. 

It was only about a half hour until she was to meet Cedric, so she thought she should start getting ready now. She stood from her bed, setting her notebook down on the table as she began to pace her room, looking around for the perfect outfit for the day. She took a short series of deep breaths before pulling on a loose, cream dress that flattered her nicely along with a brown pair of sandals.

It felt weird for her, getting this worked up over something that wasn't even a date. Or...was it? No. Cedric had a girlfriend. This was just them getting together for tea. That thought seemed to calm her down for a little while she did a small amount of makeup and finished getting ready before grabbing her bag and wand. She walked over to her door, and just as she opened it, she say Ginny Weasley standing there with a small piece of paper in hand, her fist raised to knock.

"Ginny?" she asked suddenly. She hadn't seen her in months outside of their last Quidditch match. Ginny hadn't even spoken to her after it. 

"Hey, Millie," she smiled. The two of them stood there for a moment before wrapping their arms tightly around each other. "I've missed you,"

"I've missed you so much," she whispered. "What's brought you here?"

The two pulled apart and Ginny blushed.

"Well," she started. "Harry and I actually got engaged!" she held out the piece of paper to Millie revealing a classy, shiny wedding invitation. "I was in town already, so I wanted to give you the invitation in person considering it's been so long since we've seen each other,"

"Bloody hell, Gin! That's amazing!" she cried, hugging her again quickly. "When did this happen? When's the wedding?"

Ginny quickly explained that they'd been engaged since before the Quidditch season, but the both of them were busy with work and didn't want to tell anyone or start on the planning until they both had enough free time, and now that Ginny was permanently home for the Summer, the timing was better than ever.