Enhypen Imagines

"Goodbye"

WARNING! Please do NOT read this fanfic if you are uncomfortable with suicide notes, suicide, self harm ect.

Jay's POV:

"Yes! It's so great to finally be back in Korea! I'm gonna head off to see Y/N! I won't be at the dorms today or in the morning so I'll see you boys at practice tomorrow! Bye everyone!" I bid the boys a goodbye before I made my way out of the airport and practically running to catch a taxi.

The boys and I, Enhypen, had all been on tour for two months and we had finally come back, today is Y/N's birthday and I am so excited to see her again after not seeing her for so long.

Today Y/N is going to be nineteen and I am going to take her to see my mother and father again! She loved them so much and they absolutely adore her too, it's the best having a perfect family... I also want to purpose to her today.

My hands were so sweaty the entire ride back to our shared apartment, I thanked the taxi driver and walked up to the front door, unlocking it and entering.

"Baby! I am home! Come greet you boyfriend!" I called out for her but... No reply, strange.

I walked through the house to see if I could find her anywhere but there was absolutely no sign of her anywhere in the house, maybe she was just out with friends, it was fine because I could just surprise her when she got back.

I made my way into the kitchen to grab myself a drink but I stopped my actions when I noticed a piece of paper on the counter.

Fearing the absolute worst, I walked over and looked at the note... The suicide note.

My hands were shaking like hell and I didn't want to read it myself but I had to, to know why... Why she would do it... What happened whilst I was gone for two months.

"Dear my beloved Jay...

Hello baby... I am so so beyond sorry that I had to do this to you but... I felt out of place, I felt like I didn't belong and all the hate got to me... Not as bad as the bullying did though.

I should have told you what was going on with me but I always put a fake smile on my face and pretended like everything was alright... It wasn't and I should have said something to you, maybe I would've gotten better, maybe I wouldn't have killed myself but... I didn't... I kept my mouth shut and kept everything in.

Baby... Do you remember all those times that I told you I fell, my friends cat scratched me? All those times I wore your hoodies? Every single day? For YEARS? Yeah... That's why... I've been self harming for seven years... wow. Crazy right? I know and I am sorry that I never told you anything, I should have and I know you love me because you never failed to remind me but I feel like I should have been a better girlfriend to you...

Look, I know you will argue with me on this because you are in fact Mr. Park Jongseong but... Please move on... Please find another girl or woman who makes you happy, who makes you smile and laugh the way you did with me... It may not be the same but please move on, don't grieve for years because you miss me, get over it and please move on and love someone else...

Tell the boys that I am so beyond proud of them for everything they've achieved so much... Tell them I am sorry and that I love them all deeply... I am so proud of you baby and thank you for the past three years of my life, you made me feel so loved and cared for, more than what my parents ever gave me...

Promise me something? Move on and keep performing with your head up... Keep being the amazing Jay that I know and love... Please keep going with the boys, keep Enhypen going and make Engene even more proud of you all!

I love you Jay and I always will. I am sorry I had to do this to you but it's for the better...

-Kim Y/N"

Tears rolled down my face as I finished reading the letter, I dropped down to my knees and cried, I scream, I punched the counter and I leaned against the marble counter, pulling my knees up to my chest as I cried in pain.

"Why Y/N?! Why?! Why didn't you tell me?! Why didn't you call, text, anything!" I screamed, throwing my hands into the air and crying, feeling nothing but pain and anger.

The door to the house slammed open and in ran six worried boys, they looked down at me with worried faces before looking around confused.

"Hyung. Where is noona?" Ni-ki asked me and I only cried harder before I looked at Heeseung Hyung, handing him the note as he began to read the suicide note aloud, letting everyone in the room hear it.

"Oh my god... I can't believe it... I am so sorry Jay..." Heeseung Hyung knelt down beside me and pulled me in for a hug, rubbing my back as I sobbed loudly into his shoulder.

She was gone and there was nothing I could do to help her...

*4 Years later*

No ones POV:

The loud crowd screamed and cheered for the seven young adults, crying out their names and singing along to their songs.

The boys debut song 'Given-Taken' finished playing and their concert was coming to an end, now it was time for each one of the members to give a little speech.

"And that's all from me! I love you Engene! Let's move to the last member, Jay-shi!" Heeseung screamed out, turning towards the younger male and smiling, nodding his head.

"Hello Engene!" Jay greeted the crowd, a large smile on his face as the thousands of fans screamed hello back to him.

"Engene... Today is a very special and... Sad day..." Jay started off his speech, every fan in the crowd going completely silent, letting the boy say what he wanted to say.

"Today marks the fourth year since... Since my girlfriends death... I miss her dearly and I don't know what I would've done without her... She helped us all through I-Land by cheering us all on and voting for us all... She always cheered us on when we felt like we weren't enough... She was our number one fan and was so supportive and... I took that for granted" Jay began his speech, not and salty tears started flowing down the boys cheeks, many of the fans also shedding tears, hearing the sad story of their idols lover.

"She told me to move on but truth is... I am still so in love with her that I can't... I can't move on and I don't think I ever will... She was and still is the love of my life" Jay's voice broke at the sad but happy memories that he has made with the love of his life.

"Let's not dwell on it too much as that's not what she would've wanted... She's probably scolding us all right now from wherever she is now... Let's all sing one last song before we end the concert shall we? This ones for you... Kim Y/N" Jay smiled, a happy song started playing and all of the boys loved around the stage, happily singing along, smiling and waving to their fans.

"I did it baby... I fulfilled my promise... I love you Y/N, always and forever..."

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Wow-
Who knew that I would and could write soemthing so sad and intense... I am sorry if I made anyone cry or if I broke anyone's heart but- I had to, I'm sorry!

Hey everyone! I love y'all so so much and thank you so much for 9K! It's absolutely crazy and y'all are simply the best!

Have an amazing day or night and remember to stay safe and healthy! Remember to eat and drink but also rest!

Love from nana ❤️