A I worth saving? book 2 of save me usagi .

Chapter 9: Knife called lust...

Misaki's P.O.V...

I felt so cold and numb. Not even the carvings on my arm were irritated. Everything around me was dark. No silhouette of anything for my eyes to look at. There was no sound. I couldn't even hear the sound of my own beating heart.

Am I dead?

I hope I am, in a sick way. I'm tired of feeling pain each day. I'm tired of waking up scared because of the traumatic experience. I'm sick of having to slit to feel less pain. I just want everything to end. Why won't my one wish be granted?

It's not much to ask for, it's the only thing I want more than anything itself. If I'm still alive after this I will just end it all. I'm tired of feeling the god damn pain.

It may be selfish, but I could care less. I've tried for too long to make everyone around me happy and I've forgotten about myself. Each time I felt down I would hide the pain to make another happy because I knew that's what I do best. Making others happy...

Dr. Nowaki's P.O.V...

My first reaction was despair. There Misaki lay on a gurney, bandage after bandage, towel after towel, shirt after shirt placed over the gunshot wound that went through his chest. His blood pressure was dropping and he now needed help breathing. Usagi was a mess. After he almost strangled that man, he was holding onto Misaki's limp body. I guess it was from shock. I mean, I guess I'd act the same way he did if it was Hiro in Misaki's position.

Seconds later we're at the hospital, bursting through the doors, fighting through the sea of people to get Misaki into surgery. I never wanted to see this sight again. He's been through enough, why let him go through this pain again?

Hiro's P.O.V...

What the fuck! Why the hell did this have to fucking happen again, and out of all the people in the fucking world.... it just had to be Misaki! Why can't the poor kid be left alone? He's done nothing wrong to anyone. He's kind and gentle.

Hell he's breaking and now he's dying. Why, just why? Why can't this nightmare just be over?

In all honesty, I won't be surprised if he wakes up he wishes to be dead because if it was me, I'd hope I'd never wake up and be in this God-forsaken place.

Usagi's P.O.V...

No... No No No NOOOO! MISAKI!

Why must this happen to him!? Why can't he just live a peaceful life? Why must he constantly feel pain.

He doesn't deserve to feel this way. My Misaki deserves to be happy and feel nothing but love, and have an ever-lasting smile planted across his face.

But no! He has to get kidnapped, raped and tortured for so many days and now he steps in the way of a gun to protect us all and get's shot.

Now he's lost a lot of blood.

My eyes are no longer eyes, they are just the mouths of waterfalls as the salty tears fall down the red mountains.

I want to take his place... Why couldn't it of been me instead of him? I'm so hopeless.

We were told we were not aloud to go into the operating room as they took him in to remove the bullet. It's been two hours and they've still not come out with my Misaki yet. Why the FUCK are they taking so long!

And as if on que.... The doctor walked out with tiredness written all over his face.

"We've stopped the bleeding and he's regaining the blood he lost. But there's something you may not know about the young one"

What I was told next shattered my heart to know what he did...

Misaki's P.O.V...

Now it was driving me insane. I can hear the blinking of machinery and the smell of iron in blood. Yet my world is still dark and everything around me is still cold to the touch.

I kept walking, looking for anything to notify me if I was dead or alive.
What I came across was something more sinister.

My mother and father were slowly moving towards me, crimson oozing from each lasseration on their bodies. Mother's neck was in an unnatural position whilst Fathers arm surly bent a way an arm shouldn't bend.

"This is your fault! You failure of a son. How could you do this to us! Why did you take us away from your brother? Why must you make us suffer and you stay happy?!"

My heart shattered and my mind fully broke. I always thought it was my fault that they died, and now I was finally told the truth about how they fully felt about me. I guess that proves it then...

I'm nothing but a waist of space and time. Why am I still here? I want to be dead. I don't want to be here anymore!

Suddenly, my chest was pushed and I fell to the floor. My back hit the hard ground as the wind was knocked right out of me.

Mother and Father both had the look of hatred written on their faces. They didn't love me, they look like they never did. I was a mistake...

One pulled out a knife whilst the other grabbed my arm. Even though I longed for the metal to be dragged across my skin, I tried to free myself from their grasp. I don't know why but this scared me. I didn't want anyone else to slice my body but myself.

One turned to three and three to six. It just went on and on. When they were done with that arm, they went onto the next one, doing the exact same thing over again.

After about ten minutes, they had covered my intire body with new scars. Father then took things into his own hands and began to kick me in the stomach repetitively. They never loved me, and this proved it...

Why was I ever even born?...

Hellopeoplezz I'm really sorry about not updating and I have no excuse for not updating. Anyways, I hope to finish this book off by the same amount of chapters as the last book so their even. Hope you guys had a wonderful easter. Keep smiling my smilies :)