A I worth saving? book 2 of save me usagi .

Chapter 3: God is wearing black...

HIRO'S P.O.V...

'Man, he's taking a long time' I thought to myself whilst pacing through his room, waiting for the brat to get out of the shower. Then the thought of him making himself throw up popped into my mind. God why.

Becoming more inpatient and now anxious, I go and knock on the door. From the other side of the door I hear a yelp, followed by a loud thump. My anxiety got a grip on me, causing me to pound my fist against the door, hoping he would answer or at least have the door get knocked down.

"MISAKI, OPEN THE GOD-DAMN DOOR" I shouted, forgetting about everyone in the house. To my luck, the twits downstairs didn't hear me. I think.

There was a groan from the side of the door and the sound of said door being unlocked. Instantly, I pushed the door open and engulfed the younger boy in a hug and didn't let go. I clung onto him like a mother holds her new born child. I felt like if I let go, he would get hurt again. I couldn't let that again. Never again.

"M-Mr. Hiro, what's W-wrong?" the younger boy asked. My eyes welled up with tears at how broken his voice sounded. But I wasn't going to let him see me cry. Pushing my tears back, I let go of Misaki and looked him in the face with a warm smile on my face.

"Nothing's wrong. I was just worried because you were taking a long time. But it looks like I have nothing to worry about, since you're ok now" I replied. He simply nodded at me. Giving a small sigh, I held out my hand for him to take.

He looked at my hand for a moment and pulled his sleeves down. Usually after a shower when I watch him (I think we all have to do it) I hold out my hand for him to take so that I guide him downstairs. Sometimes he's hesitant and so I pretend to leave which either makes him fall to the ground and he sits their until someone comes and gets him or he begins to shake violently and pleads for me not to leave him alone.

Today though, I decided to be patient. I wanted him to feel comfortable and not have him fall into an anxiety attack. Even if it took him a whole hour to decided, I will stand there with my hand out to him.

Finally, after ten minutes or so, he grabbed my hand and nodded, indicating he was ready to go downstairs. I smiled back at him and began to leave the room with him trailing behind me. He looked like a lost puppy, following someone who looked kind. If that's what people even see me as.

I've grown up knowing that you can't trust anyone but yourself and a small group of people that you surround yourself with. Ever since I was little people used me which I guess I got fed up of one day and went cold. In truth, I care dearly for people and their wellbeing. I'm just sacred of getting to close. I'm afraid of them just using me or dying on me.

I was snapped back to reality by Misaki pulling backwards, as if trying to get out of my grasp. I instantly swung my head back to Misaki to see his eyes filled with fear and unshed tears. "What's wrong Misaki?" I asked with concern in my voice. "I-I-I D-D-don't want T-to go to T-T-that place again" he sobbed. Shit. I thought to myself. Nowaki warned us that sometimes he may feel like he was back when everything happened with Shion and his minions. I guess you could say he has a flash back.

Letting out a shaky sigh, I pulled him slowly into a hug. "Misaki, that's never going to happen again. I won't let it and neither will Nowaki and Usagi. You're safe now" I rubbed his back, trying to calm him down. He threw his arms around me and shoved his head into my chest and began to cry violently.

"I-I-I W-want T-to get out O-of here Mr. H-Hiro!" he cried between sobs. I hugged him tighter and began to rock back and forth. I let him cry into my shirt, even though by now my shirt was soaked with tears.

I began to hear footsteps on the stairs and looked behind me to see Usagi and Nowaki standing there. I looked at them with sad eyes and then looked back at Misaki. His face was plastered with fear. I hated seeing him in pain. Hesitantly, I put my hand on his head like a mother would with a child.

Then, I felt two set of arms wrap around me and the kid. Usagi and Nowaki had wrapped their arms around us like a wall of protection. My lover then bent down to my forehead and kissed me. "You can let it all out to" he whispered. That's when I broke down into sobs. I hugged Misaki tighter and the others did the same. Misaki and I just stood there crying and Nowaki and Usagi just stood there holding us.

At some point we all moved downstairs to the couch and just sat there in each other's arms. It felt really cozy and I didn't want to move. If anything, it was the second thing that made me feel really comfy. The first is obviously being in my boyfriend's arms.

My eyes began to drop from the tiredness of my soul form all the crying that had happed for probably about two hours. Misaki had fallen asleep a while ago which that meant we could rest for a bit yet still keep an eye on him.

We all sat with blankets around us. Well, Misaki and I were leaning against our lovers as they sat there, holding onto us.

I don't know how they coped when Misaki and I were under that perverted psychos grasp. For all I know it could have driven them to the edge of insanity. It could have almost driven them to suicide. These thoughts make me feel so helpless and worthless at the same time. I could have caused my amazing boyfriend to kill himself! Why did it have to happen to us?! God has a sick way of playing with people. Is humanity just a joke to God?! Is the earth just his playground and he kills off who he pleases at any point of this 'game'?

These thoughts made me silently cry. I guess Nowaki noticed because his arms tightened around me more as I cried.

I wish this never happened to us.

I wish God would stop playing this sick game!