In Between

19. Panic and Reassurance

Previously: Spencer helped get you a dog, he slept at his apartment while you slept in yours. Harley decided to sleep with you though.

It was around 3 o'clock when you woke up. You had a nightmare. This time it was when Nick threw you at the table. You had woken up suddenly and you started to rapidly breathe. You grabbed your phone and called up Emily. You wanted to call Spencer but this was the first night of him sleeping in his own bed, in his own apartment. You didn't want to disturb him.

Emily: "Emily Prentiss." She says groggily.

Y/N: "Emily, I had a nightmare. I can't calm myself down."

Emily: "Y/N?"

Y/N: "Mhm."

Emily: "Alright, let's try this. What're are five things you can see?"

Y/N: "Harley, my vanity, the moon outside my window, my bed, and my nightstand."

Emily: "That's great, now four things you can feel."

Y/N: "Harley, my bed, my fingertips and my phone."

Emily: "Good, three things you can hear."

Y/N: "Traffic outside my window, Harley, and you."

Emily: "Two things you can smell?"

Y/N: "Harley, and remnants of my perfume."

Emily: "One thing you can taste?"

Y/N: "Toothpaste?"

Emily: "That's good enough for me. Did that help you?"

Y/N: "It did, thank you Emily."

Emily: "You're welcome Y/N. Why didn't you call Spencer? I mean, I don't mind that you called me, I'm just curious."

Y/N: "It was the first night in a long time where Spencer slept in his own bed, in his own apartment. I didn't wanna wake him. Or disturb him with something stupid."

You get out of bed and head into the kitchen.

Emily: "Y/N, that man is deeply in love with you, he wouldn't care if you called him. He'd immediately come to you for anything."

Y/N: "Yeah I know, it's just hard to comprehend that sometimes. Especially everything that happened with Nick. He made me feel worthless. He made me feel like if I asked for help I'd be pathetic for doing so."

Emily: "But you called me for help?"

Y/N: "It's different with you, you're a female, females have never made me feel like that. And I know Spencer is different, like I know he is, it's just hard. This mentality has stuck with me for years. It's gradually broken down some, but it's still there."