He's cold, insensitive and rude... But why can't I stay away?
********************
My love life was the last of my problems. Last year, bullies, penny less... Senior year didn't present itself exactly as a dream. And everything gets even worst when...
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
I stopped by the railing, lifting the camera to my eyes and fiddling with the lent until I found the right light as it slid over the flowering trees of the park . I snapped a couple shots, but still wasn't satisfied.
Now it was the weekend again, and as time passes the date where USC would allow me a trial for the a scholarship neared too and I was running out of time. I needed to step up my game or I would lose this chance too. Sighing to myself, I walked slowly to the spot of grass where Connor was boringly lying, his back on the ground and his eyes on the blue sky. There was a cigarette hanging on his lips and the hand that wasn't holding it was lazily tangled over his stomach and the shirt was wrinkled under it, rolling a bit so there was a line of bare skin between its hem and the fabric of his grey joggers.
Spring was finally showing off, and since the weather was warmer he had taken off his usual black hoodie and had it spread like a blanket under him, the bright sunlight cascading on his frame create beautiful shadows. I couldn't resist the urge and snapped a few shots of his as well before covering the final gap and sitting cross-legged.
It was really hard not to keep my eyes on him when he was this... relaxed. It was so un-Connor I was still getting used to this new dynamic.
Ever since this past Monday he'd been walking me home, we've barely seen each other in school but after the kiss and confession (kind-of-confession on his part) what before was just hanging out randomly turned into something more prevalent. He would walk me home and then we would either go skating, or hang out or he would leave for 'stuff' and then I would keep up my homework.
On Friday he even stayed around while I work, Granny wasn't home and so we went to my room. He heard me babble as I prepared my stuff, getting ready to finish the essay we had due to next Monday and tell him to make himself home. At first he just laid however, sprawled on my bed, hearing me and then scrolling through his phone while tuning everything else off. He could do that anywhere, but there was something emotionally touching that he decided to 'do nothing' with me. As if, we didn't really need to talk, just keep company as each other mind their own business.
What was even more heart shuddering, was that at some point he fell asleep as I worked, taking a nap of which he was embarrassed after, but it was cute to watch. He then briefly met Granny when he was leaving just as she arrived, and to my surprise, despise his closed off personality and the practically monologue they exchange, she liked him.
But the same question that's been on my mind ever since Monday remained: What does this new deal made us?
I didn't even know if he'd had other girls before, judging by how detached and independent he was, almost repulse by people -as he himself had admitted. What I kinda could guess was that I wasn't the first, seeing he seemed to know what he was doing when we kissed. Which we'd done a couple more times since then; but what shocked me was that whether he seemed to know what to do, at the same time he acted playful, testing, as if trying a new toy he didn't really knew how it worked.
