Something Is Missing | Ronnie Radke

Chapter 12- Call Back

"There you go, Ronnie! Get it man! Get it!" The trainer screamed as he held the punching bag in place. "Hell yeah man!"

I kept throwing punches. This was what I needed. Derek took me to the gym, knowing I needed to get my anger out. The reality was I didn't know how mad I actually was until Derek began to provoke me once we got to the gym.

"Why are you mad, Ronnie?" Derek called, from the chair he was chilling in. He really was a lazy fuck.

"Because I'm a fucking idiot," I grumbled as I threw more punches. "I fucked my life up. And I didn't stay true to my word."

"Okay... What else!? Are you mad at anyone!?" The trainer jumped in, understanding where Derek was going with it.

I sucked in a breath, before throwing a big blow at the punching bag. "Jenny," I shouted. "She wouldn't fucking listen to me! She wouldn't let me explain! She just jumped to conclusions! She walked out!"

"God," I grumbled as I shook my head and crashed down on the floor, tearing the tape off my knuckles. "What the fuck!?" I ran a hand through my sweat drenched hair as I looked down.

"Yo, Ronnie," Derek said as he stood from his hair and moved up to me. He knelt in front of me with a big smile on his face. "That was fucking awesome. How do you feel!?"

I shrugged as I shook my head. "Better. But I'm still angry at myself more than at her," I mumbled. "But holy shit.That was kinda exhilarating. It's been a while since I've felt this way."

"It's a move in the right direction man," he reminded me. "Why don't we-..."

My phone began ringing from the pile of my clothes in the corner of the room. "It's probably one of the guys wondering where we are," Derek said as he rolled his eyes. "Go get cleaned up and we can head to the restaurant.  Are you sure you still want to do dinner with us? I get it. It took a lot to even get you out today."

I shook my head. "Nah. I'll just go and take a quick shower," I replied. "Then we can do dinner."

He nodded and I stood up. My phone began ringing again. I rolled my eyes. If they wanted to reach us they would've called Derek. I made my way to my phone and hit the answer button before looking at who it was.

"What?" I barked into my phone. I rolled my eyes as there was a pause and no one answered. "Anyone there?!" There was still anger in my voice from my workout.

There was a small gasp on the other end. "N-Nevermind." And the line went dead.

My eyes went wide— It was Jenny. My heart beat jumped, practically pounding out of my chest as I pulled my phone from my ear and looked down at it with wide eyes.

"Who was it?" Derek asked as he raised a brow.

I shook my head as I fumbled with my phone. "No. No. No."

"Ron? Man who was it?!" Derek questioned, looking concerned.

"Jenny... It was Jenny! I need to call her back!" I told him. "Oh god."

***

"Jenny please call back," I mumbled into my phone. "I didn't mean to be so short earlier. I was in the middle of something and thought it was one of the guys. Please."

I'd been trying to call her for two hours, but she wasn't answering and she hadn't returned a single call.

"Please Jenny," I groaned as I leaned back on the couch and looked up at the ceiling. "I'm sorry."

Any progress that I had made at the gym was reversed. After that call, all I could do was think about her. Wonder if she was okay. If she needed something. Or if she wanted me just as much as I wanted her.

I missed having her in my arms. So much. It was all I wanted. And I missed the smell of her favorite perfume. It always accompanied her and brought happiness to my day.

I sat there staring up at the ceiling as a few tears pulled from my eyes. I really did fuck up. "Why could I just check the caller ID!?" I grumbled as I wiped my tears away. "God you're such a dumbfuck."

As I sat there all I could do was blame myself. This was all me. If I hadn't gone behind her back in the first place we wouldn't be where we were right now. This was all really my fault.

Before I knew it, I was staring back up at the ceiling, this time focusing on the ceiling fan above me. It slowly went around and around, putting me in a daze.

That was when my phone began to vibrate on the couch next to me. I instantly lifted my head and looked down at it as my heart beat picked up.

The name and the face on the screen had my heart pounding. Jenny. It was my Jen.

Without thinking, I grabbed my phone and brought it up to my ear. "Jenny! Baby! You called!"

"Yeah, I called," she shot back, her voice stern. She only sounded like that when she wasn't happy and didn't know how to face something.

"Jen, I am so sorry," I mumbled into the phone. "Seriously, I nev-..."

"No, you don't get to talk," she barked at me. "I am the one who is going to talk here."

Her tone took me aback. She'd never been so strict with me. My heart was damn near pounding out of my chest as my eyes went wide. I eyed the photo of her and I that I had hanging next to the fireplace.

When I didn't reply, she continued to talk in that stern tone of hers. "You are the biggest asshole that I've ever had to deal with. I never want to have to deal with you again. That is why I made the decision that I did. I am so done with you," She said. I could practically hear the tears in her voice.

"Jen-..."

"I'm not finished," she practically yelled. "So you are going to stay the fuck out of my life no matter what and I will stay out of yours. What I decided is truly the best for all parties." She took a deep breath, I could tell by the sound of her voice that she was definitely crying. "Goodbye Ronnie."

The line went dead.

I was completely baffled. What did she mean? I shook my head. She had to be drunk. She didn't sound logical at all.

Either way, it didn't help. She only called to leave me in the dust again.