The Fangirl that Saved the World

Chapter 27

Steve's POV

When Natalie finally fell asleep, I tucked her in and went to go find Bucky. I stepped out of her quietly to avoid waking her. She's tired and she deserves the rest. She's worked too hard.

As I walked through the halls my mind was filled with happy memories of Natalie. I could still smell her on my tear-stained clothes. My heart pounded with excitement and curiosity about what was in that sketchbook.

I knocked on Bucky's door, but I didn't hear an answer. Upon further listening, I heard mumbling. I opened the door and I saw him completely surrounded by notebooks and papers. All in Natalie's handwriting.

Her notes on the multiverse.

"Bucky, what are you doing?" I asked looking over his shoulder.

"I'm trying to figure out a faster way to get this done. I'm trying to be helpful," he replies not looking up from his desk.

"Bucky, you need rest."

"You don't get to tell me what I need, Steve," Bucky said coldly.

"Bucky, come on."

"No, Steve. For once, I get to be upset. I'm tired of standing by and torturing myself. Ever since you got that serum, you've had a fairly decent life. You got the girl, twice. First Peggy and now Natalie. You got to be the hero and everyone loves you. I got the opposite. When I got my serum, I was tortured and experimented on. I was used as a weapon and had my mind wiped so I could murder innocent lives. I am tired of pretending I'm okay when I'm not okay!"

I didn't say anything. Bucky has never raised his voice at me. That's twice now he's lost his temper. Clearly, he isn't okay.

I'm ashamed I didn't try more to help him and be there for him.

"I'm sorry. You're right."

I began to walk out of the room attempting to give him the space he clearly desires. The second I took a step Bucky shot up from his seat and grabbed my arm.

"Steve, wait. I'm sorry. I'm not mad at you. I'm mad at my life. I hate it. And I'm struggling and I don't know what to do. I need help," Bucky pleads.

He looks so sad. He's broken.

"Ah, Buck. I'm sorry I haven't been there for you," I said.

I pulled him in for a hug and I could hear him starting to cry.

I haven't heard Bucky cry since, gosh, I don't even know. Since before 1943.

"I'm so, so sorry."

~~~

The next morning, we all got back to work. Maddie, Talia, and Bucky took the notes we put together to Stark and Dr. Pym so that they could build in and include in the time travel device they are making. They're also assisting in the building process now that us non-scientists can't really be of much help.

Nattie and I were just headed that way, but I wanted to ask her if she noticed any weird about Bucky.

"Well, Steve, of course, he's acting weird. He's traumatized. He should be seeing a therapist."

"Can't you counsel him? You're trained," I asked.

She chuckles.

"As much as I want to, that would be incredibly inappropriate. Bucky never wanted me to treat him like a patient. I was supposed to be his friend. Otherwise, I absolutely would already be giving him every last piece of advice. He needs a therapist, but it can't be me," Natalie shrugged and started to walk a bit faster.

"Natalie, can I ask you something?"

She turned around with a sweet smile.

"Yeah, of course."

"What was in that sketchbook. I mean like, can I see it?"

I could feel the blush creep up on my face.

"Haha, sure, sweetie."

~~~

Natalie's POV

I watched Steve flip through the pages and his smile would grow wider and the occasional laugh would slip out.

Sometimes he wouldn't smile at all. Sometimes he would get so happy he looked sad.

Steve looked up at me and smiled.

"When did you draw all of this?" he asked.

I smiled just thinking about laying in bed staring at him.

"A lot of them were when you were asleep. I tend to wake up in the middle of the night and I would just pull in out and draw. Three in the morning was the only time you were ever asleep," I laughed.

"Why do you wake up so much?" Steve asked a bit concerned.

"Oh, you know just anxiety and things. Truly, it's not that big of a deal."

"Nat-"

I pressed a finger against his lips and shushed him. I took the sketchbook from his hands and set it aside. I moved close until I managed to wrap my legs around his waist.

I could see Steve swallow with nerves and I did so and I laughed.

"I promise you, it's nothing to worry about. I have a super soldier to protect me," I smirk.

"Yes. Yes, you do."

Steve's voice was quiet. He slowly leaned in and he kissed me.

It feels like years since I last kissed him. He was just as soft and gentle as I remember. Steve's lips slowly trailed down my neck and into my chest.

I tugged at his perfect blonde hair to pull him closer. He was never close enough.

"Steve, did you lock the door?"

My voice was hardly present. It was all air and I was hardly able to escape my throat.

"No, but part of me really doesn't care," he said quickly.

Steve hardly ever removed his lips from my skin and I didn't want him to.

I quickly removed my shirt and as did he.

Then I heard the door open.

"Hey, Natalie, we need you. Oh my god. Are you serious?"

Maddie's voice rang through the room and right behind her was Talia who looked absolutely disgusted.

I roll my eyes trying to act confidently through my embarrassment. I grabbed my shirt and put it on as I walked out the door.

"You coming, Steve?" I asked noticing he hasn't gotten up from his spot on my bed.

"I, uh, I'll meet you there in a minute," Steve said with a blanket tight against his lap.

"Ew, no stop talking," Maddie said and mimicked a vomiting motion.

Talia also didn't look too pleased.

I simply rolled my eyes.

"Oh, come on."