Spotter

Honesty

No announcements today, I just want to say thank you for all the comments and votes. They mean a lot.

-Parks 🖤

A few hours had passed in comfortable silence, with a few brief conversations sprinkled throughout. Y/N noticed that Erwin worked in waves. He would spend 30 minutes straight completely focused on the task at hand. Then, the next twenty minutes were spent either fidgeting, staring off into space, and staring at Y/N.

Y/N could feel every time he looked at her, but she didn't make it obvious. It was clear to Y/N that something was bothering him, but she didn't want to push him. She left it alone until she had run out of things to work on. Then it was her turn to stare.

She watched the muscles move in his hand as he dragged his pen across the paper. The memory of those hands on her body forced its way into her mind. Y/N blinked it away, knowing now was not the time.

It wasn't long until he continued his pattern and looked up at her. His eyes got wide, and he blushed when they made eye contact. A guilty smile played on his lips. Y/N took this opportunity to move to Erwin. She left the blanket on the couch and padded over to him in her socks. He pushed back from his deck and turned his chair towards her. His legs were spread wide, and his hands rested on his thighs.

"Do you want to talk about whatever's bothering you yet?" She asked as she stood between Erwin's knees.

He took a deep breath, then said, "yes."

Y/N couldn't form a question before Erwin slipped his fingers into her belt loops and pulled her forward. Her legs spread to straddle his lap as he continued pulling her forward and down. When she settled onto him, he let go and rested his hands on her hips.

"How honest do you want me to be?" He leaned his head back on his chair's headrest. "Should I sugarcoat some things?"

Y/N genuinely considered his questions. She had no idea what he was going to say; it could be so many things. Y/N was often scolded by friends for being too open sometimes. She figured if this relationship was going anywhere, they should start off as honest as possible.

"I won't lie, I'm nervous, but I think I want you to be entirely honest. If we want this relationship to develop, then why not?" She linked her hands behind his neck and smiled.

"That's actually what I wanted to talk about." Erwin's eyes dropped from hers.

Wait, what? Y/N was not expecting it to be something between them. Then it hit her.

"Is this about those assholes in the stables?" Y/N asked.

His head snapped up. "Who told you?"

"Who do you think patched up the boys?"

Erwin was shocked into silence for a few moments. "So, they do know about us then?"

It was Y/N's turn to be surprised. She gasped, then said, "I'm sorry. I didn't tell them on purpose; they figured it out."

"You don't have to apologize." He squeezed her hips once. "You have loyal friends. Kind of annoying fiends, but loyal..." He mumbled the last sentence.

Y/N scoffed and pushed his shoulder. "Hey! They're well-meaning kids," she chuckled.

"In all honesty, they helped Levi stop me from causing a scene."

Y/N's shoulders fell a little. "So, you heard what they said then?"

She chewed the corner of her lip as she waited for him to respond. She was terrified that he was going to say he believed what they said. That he would question her past or ask her to leave.

"I did. Levi and I heard all of it."

She closed her eyes. Here we go. I asked for it.

He placed his fingers under her chin with his thumb on her jaw, and he gently lifted her face.

"Did their words hurt you that much?" Erwin's eyes looked pained.

Y/N wanted to ask if he believed them, but she didn't trust her voice to not waver. He moved his face to try and meet her eyes. When he didn't succeed, he gave in and pulled her into a hug.

Y/N was stiff. Why is he hugging me?

"Please don't let the words of a few imbeciles upset you, little one." His hand trailed up and down her back. "They mean nothing, and your friends and Levi made sure they knew it."

Y/N could finally move, so she pulled back to look at him. Her brow was furrowed, and her mouth was agape.

"Wait," she closed her eyes and shook her head. "You don't... you don't believe them?"

Erwin felt like he had been punched in the gut. She wasn't upset about what they said? She was worried about what I thought? Erwin ached to comfort her. His hands cradled the sides of her face.

"I was so angry when I heard them speaking. Not because they were changing my opinion of you, but because of their willingness to degrade any woman, especially their superior." Erwin wiped the single stray tear that rolled down her cheek. "I wanted to beat them until I couldn't lift my arms because they were talking about someone important to me."

Y/N's lip quivered.

"Stop that," Erwin pressed his lips to hers. "Why would I care about who you were or weren't with before me? You're an adult."

"Then what has had you so distracted all night?" Y/N asked. Her curiosity took the forefront of her emotions.

Erwin sighed. "This relationship can only negatively affect you. Those men were talking about you because of me. Because this relationship is brand new, we aren't public, so if we continue like this they will continue talking. I couldn't defend you because if I did, I would've exposed the both of us." He was rambling, but he couldn't stop. "Even if this does last long enough for us to date openly, there will still be people who question your work because of me."

Y/N cut him off. "Erwin. If you were honest when you said they didn't change your view of me, then I couldn't care less what any has to say. I'm a woman in a male dominated field, this isn't the first, and it won't be the last, time I have to deal with some idiot man. Why do you think I was so excited to work under Hange?"

"And when they claim that you only have your position because of your relationship with me? If they try to discredit the work that means so much to you?" Erwin hated that this was her reality.

Y/N sighed. She knew how easily all of that could happen. "I have worked my ass off to get where I am, and I'm good at what I do because of it. I'm confident that no matter how hard they try, they will not be able to disparage me or my work."

Erwin stared at her in awe. She's fearless.

"I want to get to know you better." The words fell from Erwin's mouth. "I meant it when I said you're important to me, Y/N."

"I would love that."

"And until we're officially dating, we should probably be as quiet as possible during sex," Erwin joked.

"Stop," she whined as she buried her head into his shoulder.

Y/N could feel the chuckles leave Erwin's chest.